92. Isn't It All Supposed To Be More Beautiful Than This?

Marriage and Martinis

Adam Silverstein

Unknown

4.8 • 1.4K Ratings

🗓️ 18 November 2019

⏱️ 61 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Last weekend Danielle went to see Glennon Doyle live in NYC, and during the show, writer and activist, Glennon, said something that was a gut punch to Danielle. She was talking about how one day when she was in her former marriage, she looked around and said, "Isn't it all supposed to be more beautiful than this." It was this phrase that initiated Danielle's idea for her and Adam to check in with each other about needs they might still have within their relationship. What are they not getting enough of which they still desire? What are they currently kicking butt at in their relationship? How has everything been between them these past few months? John Gottman says that the number one questions spouses need to be asking each more is, "how are you doing?" and that is exactly what Danielle hopes this episode will lead to in more relationships.

In this episode, Danielle discusses why aging makes it even more important for partners to show love to one another.

Adam discusses how he snapped out of being in a bad mood every night after work.

The two debate how important romance is in a relationship even if everything else between the partners is completely fine.

Danielle describes what she and Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman have in common.

Adam talks about needing to take baby steps when getting back to a place they were before.

Danielle reads an excerpt from one of her favorite books, "Love Warrior."

Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off.

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Transcript

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0:00.0	May I have your attention please you can now book your train tickets on Uber and get
0:08.0	10% back in credits to spend on your next Uber ride so you don't have to walk home in the brain again.
0:16.5	Trains now on Uber. T's and C's apply. Check the Uber app. Yep. Oh, Hey guys, welcome to Marager Martini's. I'm Adam. Here's Danielle.
0:58.0	Hi. I'm going to let you describe this episode.
1:02.8	And then, of course, as usual, we'll get into my,
1:08.8	you'll ask me why he didn't prepare and I'll tell you why
1:11.2	and that whole thing that we kind of always do.
1:13.2	Maybe you should tell me why we didn't prepare first.
1:16.2	Because I spent the time, I really did.
1:20.0	You sent this to me like four days ago which is uncommon and so I did look at all these different
1:25.6	questions you sent me but I found kind of my answers were the same for all of them just in different
1:31.8	words so there wasn't much to me for all of them just in different words.
1:33.2	So there wasn't much to me to, there wasn't so much for me to think about differently from one
1:39.2	question to the next.
1:40.2	Okay.
1:41.2	Does that make sense?
1:42.2	Yeah, and it's just, it's sort of a check-in like I wanted to
1:45.2	Last weekend I went to the city with my mom and my sister my sister-in-law my brother you came for one night. My dad was in Israel, so we were sort of babysitting my mom and
1:57.1	Yeah, right? What didn't you kind of say like you're babysitting her? Yeah, she well she went home for the day. She would come home to watch her shows
2:04.0	because I get really annoyed when she keeps the TV on at our house.
2:07.0	So she would sleep at our house at night
2:09.0	with Jonah in his bed, with our youngest in his bed.
	...

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