This is the way I heard it.

For the life of him, Peter could not understand why anyone would want to date his 17-year-old sister.

It wasn't Jane kind of annoying and wasn't her new boyfriend kind of 21.

Just imagining, dopey little Jane as a sexual creature was enough to make Peter throw up in his mouth.

But it was hard not to imagine such things with a grown man out on your parents porch,

serenading your kid's sister with silly love songs.

I mean, really, how much creepier could he get?

Well, as it turns out, quite a bit.

Because that was the summer that Peter's underaged sister's older boyfriend

was allowed to move into the attic of Peter's parents' place, otherwise known as Peter's bedroom.

The situation was untenable.

Every night, Peter bumped with a grown man who yearned to be in the bedroom below them,

spooning with his little sister.

There was an upside to this awkwardness, though.

The creepy boyfriends' love songs were actually pretty good, even if they were written for jailbait.

And the guy and Peter's attic cranked them out like most people changed their socks.

Every night, Peter found himself sitting on the edge of his bed, humming along to a new tune.

One, in particular, stuck in his crawl.

An earworm. He simply couldn't shake.

One evening, the love sick boyfriend returned to the attic and found Peter sitting on his bunk,

playing his guitar, singing the song in question.

The boyfriend cocked his head.

...