Welcome to the Very Well Mind podcast. We've interviewed over 100 authors, experts, entrepreneurs, athletes, musicians, and others to help you learn strategies to care for your mental health.

This episode is hosted by psychotherapist and bestselling author Amy Morin. Now let's get into the episode.

Okay. Every Friday, I share a quick mental strength strategy that will help fix the thoughts, feelings, and actions that can fold you back in life.

Today I'm talking about something that a lot of you have asked me to address.

How do you stop comparing yourself to other people? Before we start talking about how to stop comparing yourself and how to stop resenting other people's success, let's talk about what it

means to compare yourself to others and why it's so harmful to do. Because sometimes it makes sense to actually compare yourself.

After all, how do you know if you're good at something unless you have a sense of whether

most people are better or worse than you are? You might think finishing a marathon in three days is a

great time until you learn that some people run 26 miles in less than three hours. Comparing your score,

your time, or your grades to other people can give you a sense of how you're doing.

But we often compare ourselves in unhelpful ways, too. We look at someone who's really attractive

and think, I could never be like that. Or when someone tells us about their latest vacation with a big group of

friends, we start thinking about how our lives aren't nearly as fun or fulfilling as theirs.

Comparing yourself to someone else can cause you to quickly think that you somehow don't measure up.

You might start thinking everyone else is happier, healthier, and wealthier than you are. The more you think

about how well other people are doing, the more you might start thinking about how unhappy, unhealthy,

and financially strapped you feel. Your comparisons can take a serious toll on your well-being.

In fact, I wrote an entire chapter about social comparison in my book,

13 things mentally strong women don't do. I put this topic in the women's book because

there's some evidence that women might compare themselves to others even more than men do.

For example, in one study, researchers examined what happened to people as they look at

attractive individuals on social media. They to people as they look at attractive individuals

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