836 - One Long Slit

A Mediocre Time with Tom and Dan

Tom Vann & Dan Dennis

Thomas, Radio, Orlando, Vann, Real, 1041, Florida, Tom, The, Morning, Comedy, Drunky, Daniel, Podcast, Improv, Dennis, Monsters, Dan, In

4.8 • 2.3K Ratings

🗓️ 15 August 2025

⏱️ 133 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

• Sponsorship from myeternalvitality.com and Dr. Powers
• Hormone and chemical imbalances, including testosterone issues in men in late 20s
• VitaSculpt fat reduction with fat freezing, green laser, and muscle stimulation
• $97 first VitaSculpt session with results guarantee
• LifeBase macro-based nutrition program with body scan
• Nutrition over dieting, stable snacks for glycemic control
• 2025 Tom and Dan Bad at Business Beer Fest on Nov 22 in downtown Sanford, free admission, first 500 get gift bags, beer, food trucks, vendors, live music, sponsored by Mo DeWitt at JustCallMo.com
• Nearly 10 years in Baldwin Park studio with pinball machines from pinballdudes.net
• New merch: straw hats and sun shirts by Danger Brain and Hittin Skins
• Fantasy football season starting with guillotine league format by Paul Charchian; switching from old app to Yahoo Sports; muting chat from excess messages
• 20-year fantasy football league anniversary with original members; Susie as grand champion with five wins; dislike of auto draft
• Severe hiking accident of original host: 50-foot fall, broken pelvis, hypothermia, six hours stranded, airlift rescue
• Watching new “Jurassic Park Rebirth” with Tommy; disappointment in writing; theory of simplified script for dubbing; unrealistic plot of family sailing from Barbados to Cape Town; Scarlett Johansson cameo
• Watching original “Jurassic Park” at age 11 after father’s death
• Hank Williams Jr.’s pre-accident appearance and career change after fall
• Meeting “Mr. Silly” in Publix, visiting MrSilly.com with eccentric content and conspiracy theories
• Loss of old radio recordings due to MiniDisc/VCR use; shift to digital editing
• AC as an American invention; Orlando heat hitting 111°F “feels like”; promotion of American Air and Heat
• Gully Boys band intro; promotion of BDM Nick (Mr. Pig Tits) and black metal band Aura Subversor at Conduit Aug 16
• Considering going stone sober
• Guest: Amy LaCours, licensed mental health pro and comedian
• Buying 100 lbs of green peanuts from Hardy Farms; boiling in 60-quart cooker with jalapeños, sea salt, secret ingredients during extreme heat; plan to share with BDMs
• Lighthearted gold-buying side hustle idea “Smelted Delta Gold”
• “California sober”—no alcohol but smokes marijuana; goal to perfect peanut recipe for BDMs
• Using ChatGPT and AI assistants for quick info and grocery planning
• Concern over Steve’s job security as AI completes CAD reviews in minutes; AI used in therapy; Joe Rogan’s AI-as-Jesus narrative; debate over trusting AI; GPS misdirection into a lake; preference for AI/self-driving cars over human drivers
• 1959 VBA Vespa 150 electric conversion nearly complete; possible 90–100 mph with dual batteries; idea for electric three-wheeler from Honda ATC
• Upcoming colonoscopy; hypochondria; call for self-driving planes
• Crane falling on Merritt Island home; middle-aged men watching outdoor work and offering advice
• Tommy picking a school band instrument, leaning toward trombone; influenced by cousin Becca who plays euphonium and trumpet
• Caller asking if Tom’s kids found infamous Hawaii hot dog picture; story of 1990s Hawaii trip where staged hot dog photo in family album traumatized wife’s sister for years
• Jokes about AI altering hot dog image with humorous effects
• Amy LeCours promoting upcoming comedy shows at Bull & Bush and Little Indies

###

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Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0	Today is a mediocre time with Tom and Dan podcast is brought to you by My Eternal Vitality.com,
0:06.6	Dr. Powers and his team. We've been talking about them for around a year now.
0:12.1	Hot topic of conversation in my email box because a lot of you guys have been emailing me
0:16.8	and telling me that you met Dr. Powers and he's a hell of a nice guy. I told you.
0:26.6	Yeah. Your hormone levels are off. Your body chemicals are off. You can get them back right again and feel better. And, you know, we all age. You get older. A body starts deteriorating.
0:33.6	The chemicals get off and Dr. Powers is here to help people and measure their chemicals and make sure that they're at their right place. Well, some men, I mean, even without even knowing it, some men as early as their late 20s have severe testosterone deficiencies. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's like a thing. But Dr. Powers is not all he offers. He offers a lot of different stuff. In fact, he's got a new thing he's telling you
0:54.2	about, which sounds really cool. So it's called Vitascolt. And so I talked to Dr. Powers a while
1:00.5	about this. And you know what I thought about? I was like, for people that are starting a get healthy
1:06.1	journey, right? I was like, okay, you know, I'm'm gonna start eating better I'm gonna start
1:10.8	exercising more the greatest motivation is results right I remember going through
1:15.7	this myself right and it takes a while to get results from eating right and
1:20.3	exercising right that's a fuel for the fire right so if you're doing that and
1:23.8	add vitusculpt because essentially it's a therapy that freezes your fat cells, right?
1:30.0	And then once your fat cells are frozen, he uses a green laser therapy and that breaks the cells up.
1:36.3	And then they reabsorb into your body and you lose those fat cells faster with this vitusculpt.
1:43.3	And it's so much so that Dr. Powers told me that the first session is $97. Okay. And then if you don't have measurable results, even after the first session, it's free. Which is crazy. Well, then why not? Yeah. You're dropping in there, you know, stop by for your testosterone and stay for the vitusculpt. Yeah, yeah. Why not? And then obviously, and then if you get the whole package, you're going to do this? 50%. Are you becoming that man? Are you becoming the man that wants to live forever? Yeah. No, I. Are you going to add this to your repertoire? Listen. You're going to laser your abdomen? I think you should. What do you think Bezos is doing? Lasering is out there. No, I know. You're going to get access to all this.
2:01.8	He's lasers everything.
2:02.5	He's got his own lasers.
2:03.7	Oh, yeah. I think it shows. What do you think Bezos is doing? I'm lasering is after him. I know he is.
2:17.8	No, I know.
2:18.3	You're going to access to all this.
2:19.6	He's all this.
	...

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