83: Speedrun Tactics (The Book of Jubilees, Part 2)

Apocrypals

Chris Sims

Comedy, History

4.9 • 650 Ratings

🗓️ 21 February 2021

⏱️ 71 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

We have had some points of contention, Theophiloi, but up to this point, it's mostly been about Benito's bizarre and upsetting taste in candy. This time, though, a strong candidate for the worst book we've read so far threatens to tear the show apart as a genuine undercurrent of resentment flows over how boring the second half of Jubilees is. Don't let that stop you from listening to the show, though! We promise there are some good jokes in here somewhere!

Topics of discussion: burrito distractions, Carman RIP, flaming desserts and Jubilees of various types, Reverse Benjamin Button Disease, Perversity Enmity and Room, Benito making a joke that makes me legit furious, Warp Whistling past some rough stuff, Foghorn Lord of Dreams, Jahziel, some Tony Hawk jokes I should've kept in my back pocket.

Hymnal: "Holy Calamity by Handsome Boy Modeling School, "Guile's Theme" by Sonya Belousova (https://www.youtube.com/c/playerpiano/)

Offertory: As Enoch writes, "Whoever of you spends gold or silver for his brother's sake, he will receive ample treasure in the world to come." Support the show via http://ko-fi.com/apocrypals, or check out Official Apocrypals merchandise designed by Erica Henderson! https://www.teepublic.com/stores/apocrypals?ref_id=18246

Black Lives Matter. Trans Lives Matter. Heck 12. Isaiah 54:17.

Transcript

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0:00.0	You're listening to Apocopor Pals on the Greenlit Podcast Network.
0:03.9	Make sure to check out all of our shows at greenlitpodcasts.com.
0:09.1	And in those days, if a man live a jubilee and a half of years, they shall say regarding him,
0:14.7	he has lived long, and the greater part of his days are pain and sorrow and tribulation,
0:18.8	and there is no peace.
0:20.5	For calamity follows on calamity and wound on wound, and tribulation on tribulation,
0:25.0	and evil tidings on evil tidings, and illness on illness, and all evil judgments such as these,
0:30.5	one with another, illness and overthrow, and snow and frost, and ice, and fever, and chills,
0:35.8	and torpor, and famine, and death, and sword and sword and captivity and all kinds of calamities and pains.
0:42.0	The Book of Jubilees, Chapter 23.
0:44.7	Holy calamity! Scream insanity!
0:46.9	Oh, you ever going to be's another great fan of me!
0:49.4	Boom!
0:49.8	Yeah, we're new!
0:52.3	Yeah, we're new! Yeah, We're doing. Hello.
0:56.8	Yeah, we're there.
1:02.0	Hello, friends and neighbors, and welcome to Apocopalus.
1:06.0	This is the podcast where two non-believers read through the Bible and we try not to be jerks about it.
1:08.3	My name is Chris Sims.
1:12.8	With me, as always, is the other set of footprints, Benito Sereno.
1:14.6	Benito, how are you?
1:15.6	Pretty good.
	...

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