83: GAM083 The Becoming

God Awful Movies

Puzzle in a Thunderstorm, LLC

Comedy, Leisure, Tv & Film

4.8 • 2.7K Ratings

🗓️ 21 March 2017

⏱️ 108 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

On this week's episode, Eli, Heath, and Noah team up for an atheist review of "The Becoming", which we're pretty sure was meant as a movie. With candle-based lighting, wet microphones, sarcastic scoring, and 'free with the unlimited plan' cameras, this series of scarcely coherent scenes competes for the worst film we've ever reviewed. --- If you’d like to pick up a copy of our new ebook; Diatribes Volume 2: 50 More Essays from a Scathing Atheist, you can find it here: https://www.amazon.com/Diatribes-Essays-Scathing-Atheist-Presents-ebook/dp/B06XQTJT4R --- If you’d like to make a per episode donation, please check us out on Patreon: http://patreon.com/godawful Our theme music is written and performed by Ryan Slotnick of Evil Giraffes on Mars. If you’d like to hear more, check out their Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/EvilGiraffesOnMars/?fref=ts All our other music was written and performed by Morgan Clarke. To hear more from him, check him out here: https://soundcloud.com/morgandclarke

Transcript

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0:00.0	It's just like go to one bar one time learn one thing about one thing in your movie
0:09.2	And then everyone turns into a zombie we're on zombies now
0:14.9	Those are different right?
0:17.0	Zombies are not the same as vampires are they?
0:21.2	I feel like four different pieces of shit all tried to make four different shitty movies
0:28.4	And then they all got together for drinks and they were like do you have a quarter of a movie?
0:32.2	Oh my god I've got a quarter of a movie!
0:35.2	God awful movie!
0:50.8	Welcome back to the Gamcast where each week we sample another selection from Christian cinema
0:54.6	because there are only so many doors you can slam your dick into
0:57.9	I'm your host Noah Luzon and sitting to my immediate left is my good friend Heath and right
1:01.8	Heath welcome back thanks Noah you know who doesn't make enough regular movies the cast of you porn movies
1:09.1	They should be they're more fun
1:12.3	That's what we got and sitting 81 miles to my right is my bad friend Eli Bosnick Eli how are you this fine afternoon sir?
1:19.8	Good confused aroused tired sleepy
1:28.9	Invigorated I think I might know why here but just to be official here tell us what will we be breaking down today?
1:37.7	We watched the becoming and I have no idea what happened
1:44.0	I just I don't know what happened as vampires sort of that's all I got
1:49.2	Yeah, just but
1:51.6	Yeah, we watched a suggestion from Matt that was it
1:55.6	Yeah, thank you slash fuck you
1:59.7	And Eli how bad was this movie?
	...

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