785 - Sam's Back!

A Mediocre Time with Tom and Dan

Tom Vann & Dan Dennis

Comedy, Improv

4.9 • 2.3K Ratings

🗓️ 16 August 2024

⏱️ 135 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Thanks to Sam for the surprise visit. We reached out to her on Tuesday, and she rearranged her schedule to be here. Thanks, Sam—glad to have you back for the day!

- Intro to Friday free show with Tom and Dan.
- Banter about stinky guest couch.
- Mention of Samantics Podcast and Samantha Haar.
- Tom and Dan on Orlando Weekly Best Podcast.
- Brendan from Bungalower on bowling tournament and local podcast rivalry.
- Inflatable pigeons: costs, logistics, humor, and public reaction.
- Downtown Orlando described as a "hellhole" with ticket struggles.
- Andrea’s money-saving on ticket fees.
- Controversial public art like cow sculptures.
- Corey Feldman’s Limp Bizkit tour performance, audience reaction, and stage presence.
- Disorganized Limp Bizkit concert lineup.
- Nate No-Face’s electronic performance and overcoming addiction.
- Travis’s excitement for Limp Bizkit vs. Feldman critics.
- Limp Bizkit’s nostalgic resurgence and Fred Durst’s personas.
- Debate on age limit for moshing, compared to NFL retirement age.
- Newfound Glory at House of Blues with Sincere Engineer.
- High ticket prices blamed on Ticketmaster and Live Nation.
- Dan’s experience with UB40 and live streaming concerts.
- Future of live streaming as concert revenue stream.
- AI’s role in concert production and TV shows like *Big Brother*.
- Sam’s adults-only cruise and contrast with Tom and Dan’s cruises.
- Brendan mistaken for drag queen on cruise, inappropriate touching.
- Humor about outdated sayings and playful drag queen banter.
- Sam’s busy schedule with DadBot competition and Fairvilla events.
- Chaotic Sanford event featuring "Trash King" antics.
- Hulk Hogan and Ric Flair's endorsements and celebrity products.
- Decline of celebrity worship, rise of influencers.
- Controversies on *It Ends With Us* set with Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds.
- Maisie tells Dan he embarrassed her, leading to office amenities jokes.
- Arrests related to Matthew Perry’s death, discussion on ketamine risks.
- Tom and Dan’s concern over past statements and stored messages.
- Zac Efron health scare rumors and connection to Matthew Perry.
- Losing sponsors due to controversial statements.
- Lunch lady stealing $1.5 million in chicken wings and court defense.
- Humor about lottery winners and generous claims.
- Akeem Woods raising OnlyFans price and avoiding sex for 30 days.
- Conversation on testosterone levels and TRT.
- Humor about cruise ships, balcony activities, and pervert stigma.
- Debate on what classifies someone as a pervert.
- Tom’s emotional reaction to discovering Ripley’s stories were fake.
- Caller reminiscing about 1-800 numbers and payphones.
- Nostalgia about childhood entertainment options.
- Cringe moments online, like Deadpool costumes.
- Viral fame’s impact and late-night shows like Jimmy Fallon.
- Giving relationship advice on events you don’t enjoy.
- Humor about "dying on a hill" and stubbornness.
- New Samantics episode with Chris Rock from RockPit Brewing.
- Fantasy football draft at RockPit on August 25th.
- Support "Samantics" on Patreon and Twitch.
- Mr. Beast’s past comments and inappropriate behavior.
- Closing the show and saying goodbye.

###
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**Corporate Comedy:**
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Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0	If you're looking to buy or sell your house, it's the Bart Merrick team. It is. Bart Therealtor.com. Both Bart Merrick and Crystal Vand's cell phone number is right there on the website. You can text them or call them at any time. You can't. And one half of the Bart Merrick team is in studio with us. Crystal Van is here. Hello. Good to see you. So, Crystal, let's talk about just the process.
0:23.6	If someone's looking to, you know, sell their house or buy a house, what's the first thing they do?
0:29.5	And also, I did read an article that since inflation is cooling down, they say that the interest rates are going to drop.
0:36.5	Yeah, that's what I'm hearing.
0:37.9	And it's better to act now rather than when they say they drop because then they
0:43.0	floods the market with buyers.
0:45.2	I like how you tell me.
0:48.7	You don't ask.
0:51.0	I'm no better because I'm like, yes, correct.
0:53.8	And that's what they get mad. You know how they get in me because they're like, yes, correct. And that's what they get at.
0:54.7	You know how mad they get in me?
0:55.9	Because they're like, you should step in front of him doing that and stop him from doing it. And your wife has told me to give off. So I've given up. This is the, I just got to let it go. Well, this is the audio version of me putting my coat on a puddle in front of you because I'm trying to help from getting your shoes with.
1:13.9	He's like maybe my real tour, maybe my realtor wife doesn't know what she's talking about. I better step in here. I better tell her what you're right. Yeah, I better step in here and fix it for it. I'll tell the people what the real information is. You just say, yeah, yeah, yeah.
1:27.9	You won't be working with me, though. You'll be working with the Bart Mertic team. But trust and be rest, rest assured that her husband has told her what the right thing to do. Right. You want to buy or sell your house? Call me? I'll tell you. I get the gist of what is going to happen. see whether or not
1:43.8	Crystal can't handle it.
1:46.4	They're like,
1:46.8	what are you got going on here? Ah, too little. Yeah, she can't handle that. What are you looking for? 250,000 doesn't even exist. Get the hell out of you. Who died in this coffin, E.J., not worth our time. Not worth our time. Well, that's what I tell you. I wouldn't even show up. Actually, we had a buyer just recently, a former client call us, and they wanted to buy a home for $200,000. And we were kind of like, ooh, that's, you know, it's not common like it used to be. But guess what? They found something. Oh, really? They found something. Oh, my God. You got to be a little bit more flexible when you're looking at something like that. But, yeah, they found something. So it doesn't not exist. $200,000. Yeah. Wow. You know, they had to go, you know, it's not downtown Orlando. Right, right, right. Where the pigeons are. The pigeons are down there. Have you heard about those? My God. I bet that's driving the property values down. I know where it is.
2:36.7	I don't know.
2:37.5	I don't know. No, man. We're at the $200,000 house. No, you don't. I bet you don't. Is it a dystopian jungle somewhere? No. If you drive me by it, I'll point. Oh, my God. Back in there. Where do I come in here? And when I say drive by, we better not stop.
2:53.4	We are not so. That is not true. Can't stop. Can't stop. You know if you flash your life? The protested in the room. Hit the gas. You know if you flash your lights, they think it's a drug deal. That's what my dad always told me. Don't flash your lights back.
3:06.5	Yeah.
3:07.0	Don't flash your lights back.
	...

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