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The Addicted Mind Podcast

75: The Role of Grief and Loss in Addiction with Dr. Sonya Lott

The Addicted Mind Podcast

Duane Osterlind, LMFT

Medicine, Health & Fitness, Mental Health

4.7655 Ratings

🗓️ 21 November 2019

⏱️ 27 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Today's guest is Dr. Sonya Lott, a licensed psychologist with advanced training from Columbia University's Center for Complicated Grief. Sonya runs a private practice in Pennsylvania and she hosts the Reflections on Multicultural Competence Podcast. She is the founder and CEO of Cempsych LLC, a company offering continuing education for licensed mental health professionals. 

Today, Sonya talks to us about grief and loss, which is intertwined in many ways with the addictive process. She explains that living is about connection but, ironically, the more loss we experience, the greater the likelihood becomes that we will actually fear connection. Still, it is very important to acknowledge the need for connection.

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Sonya explains that what we think and feel has a direct and immediate influence on what's happening with the neurotransmitters in our brain. This has a long-term impact on the way that hormones are released in the body. Over time, these reactions become chronic and cyclical, and they have an impact on every part of the body, including the immune system, making us more susceptible to illnesses.

Episode Link:

www.theaddictedmind.com/75

Processing loss is important and we need to grieve to do it. Many people, however, don't frame their adverse experiences in terms of loss, even though their bodies and their hearts take it in as such. Often, people end up being diagnosed with depression or anxiety without having addressed the root cause, which is usually a painful loss of connection or secure attachment from their early childhood. It's important to frame any kind of loss and grieve for it because that awareness allows people to heal in a different and deeper way. This is crucial to the recovery process and it lessens the suffering.

Losing a child is particularly challenging for parents because it goes against the natural order of things. Losing a child to an addiction is a bit like losing a loved one to suicide. It comes with a great sense of helplessness, so this type of loss could easily set someone up for complicated grief. 

Therapists who are well-informed about grief and addiction can be very helpful for finding meaning in life and establishing a new identity in terms of recovery from addiction. Self-help groups or groups like AA (Alcoholics Anonymous) and NA (Narcotics Anonymous) also provide support for individuals who are able to recognize their experiences of loss.

Links and resources:

Dr. Lott's website - https://drsonyalott.com/

Cempsych website - www.cempsych.com 

Reflections on Multicultural Competence Podcast - https://www.stitcher.com/podcast/reflections-on-multicultural-competence



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Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

All right, everyone, welcome to the Addicted Mind podcast. We are on to episode 75. My name is Dwayne

0:16.0

Osteland, and I'm your host. I'm also the founder of Novus Mindful Life Institute, family counseling

0:22.0

and recovery in Long Beach, California. If you or anyone you know is struggling with any of life's

0:27.7

challenges, please reach out to us. You can find more information about us at theadictedmind.com

0:33.6

forward slash help. Also, please, if you are enjoying the Addicted Mind podcast, share it with a friend,

0:41.2

and also think about joining our Facebook group.

0:43.9

Just go to Facebook and type in the Addicted Mind podcast and click join.

0:49.2

Okay, on to today's episode.

0:51.8

Our guest today is Dr. Sonia Lott, and she is going to talk about grief and loss.

0:59.8

And man, wow, this was a heavy episode, especially for me dealing with some of my own loss and

1:07.4

grief in the past. So I really enjoyed our conversation. It was to the point and just

1:15.5

really, you know, when you look at addiction and you look at healing and you look at just, you know,

1:21.5

when we have pain in our life, the importance of connection to be able to walk through it all.

1:26.0

And also to be able to frame addiction through that

1:30.3

lens of grief and loss. So it was a great conversation. Really enjoyed talking to Sonia.

1:35.2

I've been wanting to get her on the podcast for a while and we finally got our schedules to match up.

1:41.6

So I hope you get as much out of it as I did. Let's start the episode.

1:49.4

All right, everybody, welcome to the Addicted Mind podcast. My guest today is going to talk about an

1:57.3

issue that has a lot to do with addiction and impacts addiction, grief and loss.

2:03.6

So today we have Dr. Sonia Lott.

2:06.6

Sonia, you want to introduce yourself?

2:08.6

Hi. Yeah.

...

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