729 - The Dog Sht My Pants
A Mediocre Time with Tom and Dan
Tom Vann & Dan Dennis
4.9 • 2.3K Ratings
🗓️ 14 July 2023
⏱️ 137 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
- Get ready for an extraordinary LIVE stream as we welcome the talented national touring comedian, Luenell!
- Luenell joins us directly from the airport and graces the show with her presence for an extra-long first segment.
- Don't miss Luenell's two shows tonight and two shows tomorrow at www.theimprovorlando.com. Follow her on Instagram @luenell for more laughs and updates.
- Luenell shares her hilarious experience of getting drunk at the Usher Vegas show.
- Hear the incredible story of Luenell being scooped up by Dave Chapelle's private jet, along with other notable celebrities like Soleil Moonfry, Jaleel White, and Dane Cook.
- Discover Luenell's much-awaited Netflix special, presented by Dave Chapelle, and learn what makes it truly special.
- Prepare for some exciting whitewater rafting tales on Dave's request, and get insights into the thrilling Sphere in Vegas.
- Join the conversation as we discuss "passive pussy money" and delve into the intriguing topics brought up by Seth.
- Enjoy entertaining stories from Shart Week 2023, including "The dog sh*t my pants!"
- Seth's encounters with a kart boy and his hilarious Good/Bad segment involving puked nachos.
- Dan's amusing party experience and his initial fear of dementia.
- Engage with Zack from Ohio as he calls in, adding a unique perspective to the show.
- Tom's boys' fascination with Ohio and the captivating discussion about Seth's stop-motion troll video series, Lucifer.
Stay Connected:
- Website: https://www.tomanddan.com/
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Tune In & Turn Up:
- Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/a-mediocre-time-with-tom-and-dan/id308614478
- Stitcher: https://www.stitcher.com/podcast/a-mediocre-time-with-tom-and-dan-podcast/a-mediocre-time-with-tom-and-dan-show
- TuneIn: https://tunein.com/podcasts/Comedy/A-Mediocre-Time-with-Tom-and-Dan-Podcast-p393884/
- iHeartRadio: https://www.iheart.com/podcast/1248-a-mediocre-time-with-tom-30696640/
Unlock the BDM Vault:
- Join the BDM crew at https://tomanddan.com/registration for extra shows, OG episodes, and private BDM parties.
Rock Our Swag:
- Get your hands on the freshest Tom & Dan merch at https://tomanddan.myshopify.com/ (inventory constantly changing).
Join the Live Stream Party:
- Don't miss the daily live streams on www.twitch.tv/tomanddanlive or www.youtube.com/@tomanddanlive.
- Engage with the coolest chat crew and get a behind-the-scenes look at an indie podcast powerhouse.
Discover Tom & Dan Watering Holes:
- Visit www.tomanddanwateringholes.com and find your new favorite hangout spot. Enjoy great food, drinks, and camaraderie with fellow listeners.
Remember to subscribe to "A Mediocre Time with Tom & Dan" and leave a killer review on your favorite podcast platform!
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | This episode of A Mediocre Time with Tom and Dan is brought to you by Bart Merrick Team. You took that. I was supposed to say that. I knew you were going to take it. I watched your lips to see if you're going to take Bart Merrick Team. It actually makes sense because you're married to one of the Bart Merrick Team. Yeah, yeah. Well, I looked over you and it was like, he's not going for it. I love it. I knew you were going to do it. So anyway, if you need to buy or sell a house, go with the experience of the Bart Merrick team, Bart Merrick Crystal Van. You can go to Bart the Realtor.com. Their cell phone numbers are on the website. I think they're the best team. And you could text them or call them any time. |
| 0:38.2 | We have a team here. Me and you, we're a team. Not a good team. But I think the Bart Merrick team is a better team. It is. When you're buying the house. Oh, absolutely. If you want to waste money, we're the best. We'll waste your money. I mean, king of waste, prince of waste. We got you covered. |
| 0:53.2 | So on the line with us is Jackson. |
| 0:55.6 | How you doing, Jackson? |
| 0:56.4 | Michael Jackson. |
| 0:55.6 | How you doing, Jackson? Michael Jackson. |
| 0:58.4 | Hey, guys, I'm doing great. |
| 1:01.8 | Come on. Why did you do that noise? |
| 1:05.1 | What the? No, nobody likes that. |
| 1:07.8 | That's the moonwalker. Everybody loves a moon. Excuse me, Mr. Jackson. Do you like, whoo? No, come on. So, Jackson, um, he said, oh, yeah. Did you buy or sell your house with the Bart Merrick team? My wife and I were first-time homebuyers with them. All right. So tell us about your experience. I could not have done better. |
| 1:30.7 | My wife and I were super anxious going into the process. We had talked to a few other realtors, |
| 1:36.1 | but after having a phone call with Bard and beating Crystal and talking with them, |
| 1:41.7 | it was just the easiest process. No anxiety on our end whatsoever. |
| 1:46.2 | We're able to go in. |
| 1:48.0 | Look at houses that we found. |
| 1:50.6 | It's hard for me to believe that you were of the Jackson family, |
| 1:54.3 | consider your cell phone is horrible. |
| 1:56.4 | I'm glad. |
| 1:56.8 | And first time homebuyer, the family just left him and said, you got to buy it on your own. |
| 2:02.7 | I'm glad they didn't sell you your phone. |
| 2:05.2 | It was a bad commercial. |
| 2:07.7 | I'm joking, Jackson. |
... |
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