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This is the illusionist, in which I, Helen Zoltzman, look for the flashing beacon of language

on a foggy cliff. Today's episode contains a couple of grown-up words and mental images,

where protective clothing. On with the show.

I don't respond to anyone, so. You don't. I look at their face and I feel nothing,

that is a chilling indictment of the whole system.

A few months ago, I was a guest on one of my favourite podcasts, Y-O-Y, hosted by Andrea

Selenzy. Y-O-Y is about dating, which Andrea was doing reluctantly as she was still in

pain from a breakup with her long-term boyfriend. Approaching people is tricky online as in

real life, and because Andrea knows one of my favourite things to do is to analyse the

way humans communicate with words. She got me to take a look at the kind of opening

lines people send to each other on dating apps to initiate contact, to try to figure out

why most of them are not peaking her interest.

I feel like so much of the opening messages outside of the person sending the messages

...