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Over It And On With It

69: Get Over the Pain From a Breakup and Get to the Lessons with Jackie

Over It And On With It

Christine Hassler

Mental Health, Self-improvement, Health & Fitness, Education

4.81.7K Ratings

🗓️ 4 January 2017

⏱️ 41 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Today’s episode is about breakups. I coach Jackie through what she calls an earth shattering, heartbreaking breakup, but the lessons that surface during the call can be applied to any type of Expectation Hangover. After a breakup, our hearts hurt, we feel grief, and we miss the person we ended the relationship with. The way to get out of grief is not to obsess over your ex, beat yourself up, or go out looking for someone else. The way through the grief is to milk it for all it’s worth, and to see what it is bringing up for you to heal. In Jackie’s case, her breakup is an opportunity to reframe old beliefs she had around betrayal. She continued to collect evidence for the story she believed from her childhood. Jackie was basically dating her dad. She was trying to get the love, attention and approval from her boyfriend that she never received from her dad. Remember, whatever you are going through, no matter how challenging it is, remember it is happening for you, not to you. We can get stuck in the loop of pain if we are just looking at the current situation. Don’t think a relationship was a failure just because it ended. Some relationships have an expiration limit. Look for the lessons the relationship is there to teach you. Look for the reasons you brought the person into your life in the first place. If your intention for the new year is to connect with a community of like-minded people and follow through with your meditation goals, joining my Inner Circle will assist you with both. The Inner Circle is a membership community where you get access to one-on-one coaching calls, my customized, guided meditations and visualizations, and lifestyle practices. E-mail [email protected] with any questions you may have. Consider/Ask Yourself: ● If you are going through a breakup, are you willing to see the pain as a catalyst for growth? ● Are there breakups from your past you got through, but never really got over? ● Could old wounds be impacting the people you are attracting to a relationship? ● Is there someone you know is bad for you to be in a relationship with, but you find yourself going back for more? Jackie's Question: After a recent breakup, Jackie would like to know how she can move past a relationship that was bad for her. Jackie's Key Insights and Ahas: ● She feels people are deceptive and tricky. ● She felt lucky her ex chose her. ● She played small around her ex. ● She feels like it’s unsafe to be her, and she wasn’t good enough. ● She collected evidence to confirm her long-held beliefs. ● She longed for attention from her dad. How to Get Over It and On With It: ● She should ask herself what she is learning, and why she drew this person to her. ● She should release the judgment that being vulnerable makes her messy or weak. ● She needs to confront the truth that she was the daughter of an alcoholic. ● She should go back and communicate to little Jackie. ● She should find a connection with the divine masculine. ● Write out a reality check letter to herself. ● She should attend My Signature Retreat in March 2017. Assignments: ● Read and watch my blog and Vlog about How to Get Over a Breakup. ● Read my book Expectation Hangover. ● Take an inventory of your previous breakups, to see if you are repeating patterns in current relationships. ● Try to attend the ladies only Signature Retreat this March. Sponsor: Freshbooks: Get a Free 30-Day Unrestricted Trial to Online Accounting Software. Enter “Over It and On With It” in the ‘How did you hear about us?’ section. Resources: Christine Hassler Christine Hassler Podcasts Find me on Snapchat @chrishassler @christinhassler on Twitter @christinehassler on Instagram [email protected] [email protected] - Send your questions to be answered on Coaches Corner. Christine’s BooksExpectation Hangover20 Something. 20 Everything

Transcript

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0:00.0

This is episode 69. Get over the pain from a breakup and get to the lesson with Jackie.

0:07.0

Welcome to Over It and On With It. I'm your host Christine Hasler and for over a decade I've been a life coach, speaker, and author.

0:15.4

Each week you'll hear me work directly with a caller as I coach them through a goal they want

0:18.8

to accomplish or an obstacle they may be facing.

0:21.3

I'll provide a blend of practical and spiritual advice as well as

0:24.2

tangible actions you can apply to your own life. Now let's get on with the episode.

0:38.6

Hi everybody and welcome to the first episode of 2017. I hope your new year is off to a great start and I had a couple new year's goodies for you. I want to make sure you caught those.

0:45.0

Last week in Coaches Corner, I did a guided visualization meditation to help you let go of 2016 and bring in 2017. So go back and check out last week Coaches Corner.

0:57.0

And also on my blog at Christine hasler.com I take you through a ritual that I've done every new year for the past 10 years, which is really

1:05.1

awesome and so many people that have followed me for years do it every year with me.

1:09.7

So go check that out too.

1:10.9

And even if you're listening to this episode way past the new year

1:14.0

you don't have to wait for a new year to do an intentional

1:17.0

letting go and bringing in process.

1:19.0

You can do it at any time.

1:21.0

So again, you can go grab that at Christine Hasler.com. Also if one of your

1:25.9

intentions in 2017 is to be more disciplined about your meditation practice,

1:29.9

connect with more like-minded people and attract more of what you truly want in life.

1:34.6

Then joining my inner circle is an amazing way to kick off the new year.

1:38.6

Building this community is one of my primary intentions this year.

1:42.0

Now that the podcast has been going for over a year, I've heard

1:44.7

from hundreds of people who are longing for more connection and teaching and coaching

...

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