625 - Bah Ha I'm Horney

A Mediocre Time with Tom and Dan

Tom Vann & Dan Dennis

Improv, Comedy

4.9 • 2.3K Ratings

🗓️ 18 June 2021

⏱️ 178 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

I'm back. Damn. That took a second. There was an actual time that I didn't think me and my family were going to make it home. (You can listen to that entire story on tonight's ACT if you so care.) Here's all the plug stuff and look for the meat at the bottom. :)

You can find us on Twitch HERE: www.twitch.tv/tomanddanlive

You can find us on YouTube HERE: https://www.youtube.com/user/AMediocreTime

Other podcasts aggregates or scrapers:

Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/a-mediocre-time-with-tom-and-dan/id308614478

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iHeartRadio: https://www.iheart.com/podcast/1248-a-mediocre-time-with-tom-30696640/

Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/0IMs3hgNDuD6qI8ldHMWvH

…

On this week’s show:

* Andrea yelled at a lady in the airport

* National Flip Flop Day

* Baha I'm horny

* Cake and eggs

* Uncle Carl boat story

* Sandwich bag of frozen butts

* Arnold Palmer hand/foot job

* Champagne Jesus Willy Nelson

* Tokyo Olympics

* Prison Olympics

* The Dee Gees

* World's biggest kidneys

* Nuclear fusion

* Brooksville water tower

* Prank wars going strong

* Giving up is awesome

* Aqua cycle trike up St. Johns with Tuddle

###

Have a fantastic weekend! To all of our Dads, we hope that you have a fantastic 2nd place day. And on that note, we'll see you next week! - d

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0	How about a floor?
0:01.5	How about a roof?
0:23.1	How about a dildo that you can boof? We got you covered with Tom and Dad. We got you covered. No. That, it doesn't make any... It does make sense. Floor roof, boof. Yeah, I know. Yeah, yeah. The song makes sense. Mild or top of your house. Bottom of your house. Yeah, bottom of your ass. Yeah, you're right.
0:23.4	Okay.
0:24.2	We got your cover. Bottom of your house.
0:21.1	Yeah, bottom of your ass.
0:22.2	Yeah, you're right.
0:23.2	We got your cover.
0:24.1	That makes sense.
0:24.6	All right.
0:25.0	All right.
0:25.3	I'm in.
0:26.0	I'm in. I did it. At home floor store. Yeah. At home floor store. if you need new flooring they're going to save you money because they don't have the expense of a brick and mortar location. That's why they come to you in their at-home floor store van. Let's save you money. And yeah. They have all the samples. They could leave the samples with you. They did it with me. They did it with Daniel. Tons of BDM. It makes the process of selecting flooring a lot easier because you get the flooring inside your house, not inside the showroom.
0:56.3	Here's another thing. I've seen your floors. You need new floors. Your floors are terrible. You know they are.
1:02.1	I knew mine were. You would tell me. You and your wife would come to my house. And then when you'd leave with your two lovely little Swedish boys, you would clown my floors. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know you would. Yeah, yeah. My floors looked like little dogs had peepied all over the place. Yeah. And that's because they had. I'm like, boys, put your shoes on. We're going to Uncle Danny's house. Yeah, yeah. His floors are shit. Wow. You've got that luxury vinyl plank. I do. That save you tons of money because they can install that over your existing floors. Indeed. Right on top of the tile. Yeah, not in all scenarios, but they can do that and they don't have to rip up all the tile. But if you want to do that like I did, you know, they could offer that service as well. Their guys are great. What do you want? Their demolition team is great. Their installers are perfect, dude. Like, the guy took so much care installing my tile and laying it perfect. Like, the guy was an artist. And let's not sleep on carpet. You know, I just got back from vacation. And the entire hotel room that I was in was all tile. Now, don't get me wrong, I love tile. But when I got home and I was able to put my toes in that, the pile on this carpet that we got from at home floor store is like walking on a cloud. I missed it. But just go and check them out, man. You owe it yourself. You know you want to shop around anyway, so go to At Home Floor Store.
2:23.0	And if you do use them, make sure you let us know, because we love to know when you're using our fine sponsors.
2:24.9	At HomeFloorStore.com.
2:28.3	Live from the Streamline Mortgage Solutions Studio.
2:31.6	It's Orlando's own Tom and Dan. Whoopi!
2:41.5	Hello, this is your mediocre time with Tom and Dan program.
2:51.3	We hope that you will find our presentation, precise, joke heavy. And just right.
3:25.3	Thanks. Welcome to the Friday free show of a mediocre time. Welcome to the Friday free show of a mediocre time.
	...

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