6135 WHEN DO PEOPLE BECOME RESPONSIBLE? ANSWER TO ‘X’ LISTENER QUESTION
Freedomain with Stefan Molyneux
Stefan Molyneux
4.6 • 2.4K Ratings
🗓️ 11 October 2025
⏱️ 40 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
This lecture examines the delicate balance between allowing individuals, particularly children, to experience the consequences of their actions and the instinct to protect them from harm. Through personal anecdotes and the lens of Aristotle's philosophy, the discussion highlights the importance of finding equilibrium between accountability and shielding. It explores developmental milestones in responsibility, contrasting the abilities of children and adults to manage their choices, supported by case studies on resilience and self-ownership. The lecture also addresses the evolutionary roots of protective instincts in parenting, the complementary roles of mothers and fathers, and the impact of societal structures on individual accountability. Ultimately, it prompts a reflection on personal responsibility and societal support, urging for a more nuanced understanding of when consequences are appropriate in fostering growth and well-being.
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | All right, it's a great question from a listener on X. |
| 0:03.0 | This is always the hardest one for me. |
| 0:04.6 | To what extent should we let people suffer the consequences of their actions? |
| 0:11.3 | I mean, that's a challenge that I'm facing as a parent at the moment, |
| 0:14.2 | which is, I mean, my daughter's almost 17, |
| 0:17.6 | and it's not my job to fix her problems anymore. |
| 0:21.6 | I mean, I can give her some feedback, some advice or whatever. |
| 0:24.0 | But if she has challenges in her life, which we always do, |
| 0:27.0 | it is not my job to fix the challenges that she has in her life. |
| 0:33.3 | I'm available as a resource, but I'm not going to fix them. |
| 0:37.8 | Now, of course, let's look at the good old place to start with these kinds of questions, right? |
| 0:41.7 | It's not black and white answers, right? |
| 0:43.3 | So the best place to start with these kinds of questions is the good old Aristotelian mean. |
| 0:49.3 | Good old Aristotelian mean. |
| 0:51.3 | So in said good old Aristotelian mean, the question is, where do you sit in the |
| 0:57.7 | middle? On the one extreme, it's let everyone even toddlers suffer the consequences of their choices. |
| 1:06.8 | Clearly that would be wrong, bad, and unjust. On the other hand, it would be the other extreme, |
| 1:13.1 | don't let anyone, even adults, |
| 1:16.4 | suffer any negative consequences for their actions, |
| 1:19.3 | which would also be extreme. |
| 1:22.0 | So recognize that it is not a black and white issue, |
| 1:24.8 | it's a balance issue, |
... |
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