Hello my friends it's me Duncan and this is my podcast if this is your first time here I want to recommend that you stop inviting that multi-colored undulating reptilian lizard thing into your bed.

It's not normal.

I don't want to seem old-fashioned,

but the fact that you let a strange hyperdimensional lizard that followed you all the way back from Peru

on your weird Iowasca trip burrow in your butt cheeks at night.

And look, I have nothing against burrowing into butt cheeks,

but I mean human to human.

These lizards are fucked up. My friend has one. His ass is a mess now.

Completely scabbed up. It's not meant to be there. It's not a place anything should sleep

Lizards should sleep on rocks or in like granite cliff faces not in the sweet, precious, sacred, beautiful ass that the Lord gave you.

This is bad. You know, maybe I'm just getting old, but this trend is bad.

No one knows what the things are. Number one, some of them are poisonous.

I know that in a recent laboratory study performed by

Stanford professor William Drake. It was found that the gills of these lizards

have within them toxic serotonin poisoning nodules.

You know what that means? That means if that lizard has a bad dream while it's sleeping in your ass those nodules could get activated and

it could spray that right into your butt and that's going to go right into your

brain and it's going to fry your brain kids. You know when I was

coming up we had just basic LSD, maybe some mushrooms, maybe some inhalants here and there,

but we sure as fuck weren't putting lizards in her ass at night.

And, you know, again, I don't want to be the get out of my yard kid guy. I want, I like that young people listen to this podcast, but come on man.

Come on, I know you guys heard about Tony French from Detroit.

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