From flowingdata.com, these are the oldest names in the United States.

For example, last or first?

The average myrtle is 84.3 years old.

Man, I haven't known a myrtle.

Mertil.

And 31% of myrtles are in their 80s.

They list 12 of them here, predominantly female.

Nanny is 84 years old.

The average nanny.

Now, we called my grandmother on my dad's side nanny, but that wasn't her name.

Yeah.

That's actual name.

This is an actual given name, I guess.

Yeah. Gertrude is 83.5 years old.

Flossie is 82.6?

Flossi.

Wow.

Oh, that's old school.

Bula, which is Annette Benning's character on Dutton Ranch, isn't it?

She's a Bula?

Yeah.

The average Bula is 82.2 years old. Net Benning is not 82.2 years old. She's 67. She looks older, I think. Yeah, the character seems to be more like in the mid-70. Right, yeah, yeah. Mildred is 81.1. Oh, Mildoo. Yula. I don't know if I've ever met a Yula. My wife's grandmother. Is Yula? It was a Yula. Old lady. Was a Yula. I don't know if I've ever met a Yula. My wife's grandmother. Is Yula? Old lady. Was a Yula. Was. 80.9. Ethel is 80.8. Ethel. Bet. 80.6. Just bet? Yep. Blanche. 80.6. Blanche ain't a sexy name at all, is it, man? But yet she was the horror. Oh, the girl's sexier than Bula. We finally get to the, some dude names here. Do you think Blanche is sexier than Bula? I think so. Seymour is 80.5. Is that a chick's name? No, dude names. Oh, these are all names together. As in butts. Right. Is it because dudes don't have the life expectancy of women? Probably. We've got to go ten deep to get the oldest names here. That would stand to reason. And your average dick is 80.2 years old. There is a lot of older dicks in that. A lot of old dicks around there.

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