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The Suzanne Venker Show

57. The Bill & Suzanne Hour: Dumb Ideas about Marriage People Think They Have to Follow

The Suzanne Venker Show

Suzanne Venker

Society & Culture

4.9650 Ratings

🗓️ 9 August 2020

⏱️ 46 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Do you ever feel pressured from the culture to do marriage a certain way? Does it cause you to wonder about other people’s marriages—how they do things, perhaps—and then you get caught up in thoughts about what you think you should be doing?

As natural as that tendency may be, my husband Bill and I going to talk about why cultural pressures should not cause you to be plagued w feelings of inadequacy re your marriage so long what you do works for the both of you. To that end, we’re going to discuss five dumb ideas about marriage many people think they have to follow but actually don’t.

IN THIS EPISODE:

4:40 -13:05 — #1: There's no such thing as a 'soul mate.' Bill and Suzanne discuss the idea of soul mates and the idea that your spouse should be your soul mate, why soul mates are unrealistic and how you can “love someone” but that doesn’t mean that you should be with them. They also talk about the culture and how young people in particular are bombarded with the myth of the soul mate

13:10- 26:10 — #2: You don't have to sleep in the same bed to have a good marriage. Bill and Suzanne discuss the taboo of sleeping in different beds. They also talk about their own marriage in regards to sleeping in the same bed, the history of couples sleeping together in the same bed and how as marriage changes (due to stress, partners who snore, etc.) sometimes sleeping together in the same bed is too difficult

26:10-31:25 — #3: Your sex life doesn't need to look like the sex on TV. Bill and Suzanne talk about married sex, why your sex life will ebb & flow depending on where you are in your marriage and especially when you are raising your kids. They also discuss how the culture pushes a narrative that sex should be ultra romantic and you should be swinging from the chandelier and WHY THAT IS NOT REALISTIC!

31:25 - 36:05 — #4: Just because divorce has crossed your mind doesn't mean you married the wrong person. Bill and Suzanne talk about how through the course of marriage you will have ups and downs and just because you may have had a fleeting thought of divorce doesn’t mean you married the wrong person. They talk about how marital problems and issues do not get solved by leaving or by finding someone else, thinking the idea of “another life” would be better or more fulfilling.

36:10 - 44:25 — #5: There's no such thing as an "equal" marriage. Bill and Suzanne discuss why sex differences work in marriage. They also reflect on their own parents’ marriages and what they saw growing up with their own parents. They talk about how they brought what they saw in the past from their parents into their own marriage.

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Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Welcome back to the Suzanne Venker Show, where men and women are equal in value, but wildly different by nature.

0:18.0

Join us here every week when we challenge the culture's hugely flawed narratives

0:21.5

regarding men, women, sex, and love. This program is brought to you in part by Let's Get Real,

0:28.1

where forensic accountant Tiffany Couch uses her financial skills to shine the light on the real

0:32.7

issues we all face every day. If you would like to make decisions based on facts and information rather than

0:38.3

on rhetoric and cultural pressures, go to let's get real life.com, a place where you can find

0:44.6

tools to improve your communication skills and to increase your connection to humanity.

0:49.6

That's let's get realLife.com.

0:58.7

Okay, last week I told you that our new monthly segment, the Bill and Suzanne Hour,

1:00.9

would begin on August 17th.

1:05.5

But my guest for this week had to reschedule so my husband Bill is actually here with me a week early for our first installment.

1:08.8

He and I have been busy organizing controversial topics to discuss,

1:13.1

all related to marriage, as well as to our political climate. So if you have something you'd like to

1:18.4

request, you can email us at suzanne at the Suzannevenker Show.com. Today on the show, he and I are going to

1:25.5

discuss dumb ideas about marriage people think they have to follow.

1:30.8

But before we get to that, a couple of quick announcements.

1:33.5

I'd like to remind you to please consider becoming a Patreon subscriber.

1:36.7

There are four very economical levels, and when you sign up, you get all kinds of perks,

1:40.5

depending on which tier you choose.

1:42.2

All you have to do is go to the susanvenker show.com

1:45.0

and scroll down until you see the become a patron button in the middle of the page. Also,

1:50.0

if you're looking for marriage or relationship coaching, just go to my website, suzannevenker.com

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