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Multiamory: Rethinking Modern Relationships

566 - More Than a Numbers Game: Dating Truths from Feeld's Data Team

Multiamory: Rethinking Modern Relationships

Multiamory, LLC

Relationships, Education, Sexuality, Society & Culture, Self-improvement, Health & Fitness

4.9970 Ratings

🗓️ 10 February 2026

⏱️ 80 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Today we're diving into one of our favorite things - data! We're excited to welcome Sy Dusk and Alexandra Kilpatrick from Feeld. Sy is a data analyst and Alexandra is the head of UX research at Feeld, and both of them helped analyze our co-sponsored research survey on non-monogamy (find the study here: http://multiamory.com/study). We'll be exploring what the data says about how non-monogamous folks date, what labels mean or don't mean, how polycules are configured, and some of the challenges facing our community. Find Feeld's data blog here: https://feeld.co/uncharted-territory/open-invitation-understanding-polyamorous-and-ethically-non-monogamous-daters Sy Dusk uses data to shine a light on the nuances of desire, identity, and culture. They specialize in sexuality, relationships, and dating. Sy is currently a data analyst at Feeld working on creating an unparalleled experience for non-monogamous daters. Alexandra Kilpatrick is the Head of UXR at Feeld, where she has worked for the past year and a half. She has an academic background in Digital Anthropology, and prior to Feeld, researched identity information in virtual worlds such as the Metaverse. Often collaborating with academics, her work brings big-picture cultural insight into how people date, connect, and explore sexuality. She cares deeply about the duty of care for members and about conducting research ethically, responsibly, and with genuine respect for the communities Feeld serves. Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.com/join. We offer sliding scale subscriptions so everyone can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community.Take Beducated's quiz and get your 2026 intimacy roadmap at beducate.me/pd2607-multiamory Whatever you want to learn, MasterClass has something for you, taught by experts in their fields. Support the show and get an exclusive 15% offer at multiamory.link/masterclass.Skillshare is an online learning community with thousands of classes for creators. Everything from graphic design and video editing to photography, writing, and business. Get a free month of Skilllshare at multiamory.link/skillshare.Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com. We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0

As much as I love being your digital friend, let's hang out in real life.

0:03.9

To do that, we're hosting a three-day restorative retreat at a queer-friendly private property in Florida this May, and we would love to see you there.

0:13.0

Join us for relationship recess, a three-day, two-night retreat focused on nourishing your connections through the power of pure, authentic play, and deep exploration. We've partnered with our friends, I guess our digital friends at normalizing non-monogamy. They feel like real friends, but I guess we haven't met in real life yet. We're about to be at the same time as you. Yeah. Okay. So our digital soon to become actual real friends, Emma and Finn, from the Normalizing non-monogamy podcast, and also play consultant Gary Ware. It's going to be taking place May 1st to the 3rd, 26 at the incredible Great Escape Lakeside in Claremont, Florida. So here's what to expect. We're going to do some speed friending to help break the ice. We're going to be facilitating small group sessions about some

0:54.3

of our practical tools like microscripts and radar. And then it's going to be all the wealth of

0:59.7

activities that the property has to offer us. So Emily leading some karaoke, I'm going to try

1:04.1

to lead a pinball tournament. Gary's going to lead some outdoor games, plus everything else that's

1:08.3

on the property. So we got human-sized foosball, a hot tub,

1:11.4

lazy river, a movie theater, escape rooms, so much more. Absolutely, everyone is welcome,

1:16.8

so that means solo folks, partners, friends, every type of relationship style. And also all of the

1:22.6

meals and the snacks and drinks are included. And additionally, we have a discounted block of hotel rooms available exclusively for our guests.

1:30.8

Head to multi-amory.combe, slash recess, 26 for full details to check out the venue and to grab

1:38.7

your ticket before the price increases.

1:41.0

Payment plans are available.

1:42.9

That's multi-amory.

1:43.9

That's multi-amory.com slash recess 2026.

1:51.4

For every study that we do, we have that Gen Z versus non-GENZF perspective. And the

1:55.9

differences are wild and they just can't be underestimated. I mean they range from everything from like different

2:03.0

mental models of how people actually physically interact with a dating app. I think sober culture is

2:09.1

another kind of rising trend that we really need to account for. But also anxiety, loneliness and kind

2:16.9

of fears around monogamy about this desire from monogamy

2:20.6

and a lot of the anxiety that sits around that, but also this desire to explore elsewhere.

2:26.3

There's lots of different data points and then as we kind of came out of Gen Z, we kind

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