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Ghostrunners

55 - Derek Jeter & Vladimir Putin at the Same Party

Ghostrunners

Jake Triplett

Stand-up, Improv, Comedy

4.92.3K Ratings

🗓️ 25 May 2020

⏱️ 96 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

We have a new Ukrainian friend, one of us might remove laser hair, and we discuss what different characters in The Office would be like during a pandemic. Subscribe to us on YouTube: https://bit.ly/3cQSPnw Follow us on Instagram: http://bit.ly/33WAq4P Leave us a voice memo and ask a question: https://anchor.fm/jake-triplett/message Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

How does anyone ever get good at extreme sports?

0:03.8

Like guys who can back flip on roller blades and land back on their roller blades?

0:08.4

There's no like stop before. Yes, same thing. Yeah.

0:10.4

Oh, they're gonna say like I've tried this before it's not that it. No, I've tried before and I did not play sports for another like five years after that

0:16.0

because I was paralyzed from the neck down. Like almost any Olympic sport, how are you do you progress?

0:21.9

And just like I can't quite land the 900 on the

0:24.9

snowboard right I get about 850 which is the back of my neck right exactly like like the

0:30.1

divers divers that just do like 15 flips.

0:32.7

If you screw that up and a half hurts real bad.

0:35.5

Or even just like street performers

0:37.5

or like no one's just okay at sword swallowing.

0:40.1

Right.

0:41.1

I'm working with some daggers, you know, move my way up. I'm working on. I'm working on.

0:43.0

You know, move my way up.

0:44.0

I don't know.

0:45.0

Last week was awful.

0:47.0

I really choked.

0:48.0

I don't know.

0:50.0

All right, roll the intro music.

0:52.0

Oh, shoot. All right, roll the intro music.

0:55.8

Oh, shoot, yeah.

0:59.6

Come on, fresh ghosties. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, I think this tightly means that this going down with some random thoughts and white me.

...

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