Radio Manu, Papa Tchango.

Hey Chris Nick here. I was just listening to episode 536, a Roma, and you're responding to a question by a young guy named Cole about, um,

like how to kind of recognize beauty and a woman and not just get so focused on the physical aspects, physical beauty of a woman.

And I'm, I'm 33 and I kind of remember going through something similar in my early 20s. Um, and something really changed for me when I, what I started noticing is that I would meet women in my life and my initial thought about them was like, oh, she's not that attractive. She's not that physically attractive to me.

And then I would notice after spending some time with some of these women that something clicked and it's like I would start seeing them as very physically attractive.

And what I think was happening for me was that because I was getting to know them on a deeper level, I was projecting that deeper level of attraction onto the physical plane.

And that kind of then became a, um, like almost like a barometer for me when I was meeting women is it like, is my first thought when I'm meeting somebody, oh, she's gorgeous.

Because then, okay, maybe I'm going to fall into a trap and I'm going to sort of justify spending time with her because she's physically beautiful.

Whereas if my initial thought was like, oh, I'm not that attracted to her, but then, and I noticed that and then that flips at some point and I start thinking she's physically attractive.

Then I'm, then that's a sign to look, say, oh, like, okay, maybe, maybe there's actually something here. Maybe I should spend more time with this person. Maybe, maybe we have something.

Uh, so that was my experience with that.

Thanks, Nick. That experience is wise, I think.

And, um, it's an experience I wish.

I was going to say I wish I knew about earlier in life, but maybe I did.

It's hard to remember sometimes what I learned and when and all that stuff.

Um, but definitely there was a time in my life where I was a lot more keyed into these questions of physical beauty than I am now.

And, um, I have a friend who's very aesthetically inclined. He's, um, he's an artist and he surrounds himself with beauty and his house is beautiful and is just everything is beautiful.

The way things are arranged and the colors and just see he pays a lot of attention to this stuff.

And we were talking one time about beauty and I was trying to say to him without being aggressive.

I was trying to say that I worry sometimes that his attunement to visual beauty blinds him to not be a person.

And I'm trying to say to him to non-visual sorts of beauty, which isn't totally fair because he's highly attuned to music as well, which is non-visual, obviously.

Sometimes it feels like, you know, like there are people who eat with their eyes, right? And it's like the food, the presentation of the food on the plate outweighs the actual flavor.

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