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The Jordan Harbinger Show

535: Should Siblings Unite to Confront Abusive Parents? | Feedback Friday

The Jordan Harbinger Show

Jordan Harbinger

Education, Business, Science

4.812.3K Ratings

🗓️ 15 July 2021

⏱️ 50 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

You and your five siblings aren't close, but you all have one thing in common: you endured a childhood marred by abusive parents who played you against each other. Now that you're all adults, you'd like to unite your siblings to confront your parents as a group for some closure -- but you're not sure they're all on board with the idea. Is there a good way to convince them, or might it be possible to get the closure you're looking for without their help or even a confrontation at all? We'll get into this and more here on Feedback Friday!

And in case you didn't already know it, Jordan Harbinger (@JordanHarbinger) and Gabriel Mizrahi (@GabeMizrahi) banter and take your comments and questions for Feedback Friday right here every week! If you want us to answer your question, register your feedback, or tell your story on one of our upcoming weekly Feedback Friday episodes, drop us a line at friday@jordanharbinger.com. Now let's dive in!

Full show notes and resources can be found here: jordanharbinger.com/535

On This Week's Feedback Friday, We Discuss:
  • Is it worth trying to unite your siblings for a confrontation with your abusive parents to gain a sense of closure? [Thanks to clinical psychologist Dr. Erin Margolis for helping us with this one!]
  • You've postponed your wedding twice due to the pandemic, but two very close people in your life have passed away in the interim -- and it's hard to imagine having this wedding without them. Is there a way to somehow include and honor them in the ceremony?
  • As a middle manager, you rely on your second-in-command to lead the department so you can focus on admin. Unfortunately, he fails at every step and creates more work for you than he saves. He can't be fired, transferred, or demoted, and he refuses to improve. What can you do?
  • You're a teenager living in a household with your father and a verbally abusive stepmom who doesn't like teens. You'd prefer to live with your biological mother, but the custody agreement as it stands wouldn't allow it. How can you convince your dad and stepmother that changing the agreement would be the right move for everyone?
  • You consider your current sales job as a placeholder until you can get your master's degree in mental health counseling. The hitch is that your program requires your completion of a nine-month internship that would fall during your busy season in two years. What's the least awkward way of bringing this up to your boss -- who doesn't yet know about your aspirations in a completely different field?
  • Have any questions, comments, or stories you'd like to share with us? Drop us a line at friday@jordanharbinger.com!
  • Connect with Jordan on Twitter at @JordanHarbinger and Instagram at @jordanharbinger.
  • Connect with Gabriel on Twitter at

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Transcript

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0:00.0

Hi, this is Chris Howard, host of Plugged or Chris Howard, and I'm taking okay state over the Wisconsin Badgers in their game December 27th.

0:07.0

Bedon Line has free odds and odds available online or on your mobile device. Visit BedonLine.net today.

0:16.0

Welcome to Feedback Friday. I'm your host, Jordan Harbinger. Today I'm here with my Feedback Friday producer, my Amigo and Advisory, Gabriel Mizrahi.

0:25.0

On the Jordan Harbinger Show we decode the stories, secrets and skills of the world's most fascinating people and turn their wisdom into practical advice that you can use to impact your own life and those around you.

0:35.0

So we want to help you see the matrix when it comes to how amazing people think and behave.

0:39.0

And our mission is to help you become a better informed, more critical thinker so you can get a much deeper understanding of how the world works and make sense of what's really happening even inside your own brain.

0:50.0

If you're new to the show, on Fridays we give advice to you. We answer listener questions. The rest of the week we have long form interviews and conversations with a variety of really amazing people from spies to CEOs, athletes, authors, thinkers and performers.

1:04.0

If you're joining us for the first time or you're looking for a handy way to tell your friends about the show, we now have episode starter packs.

1:10.0

These are collections of your favorite episodes organized by popular topic that'll help new listeners get a taste of everything we do here on the show just visit Jordan Harbinger dot com slash start to get started this week.

1:22.0

We had Tristan Harris, maybe you saw the social dilemma on Netflix really, really interesting documentary about how social media is essentially creating separate realities for everyone based on what they believe and what they click on and what they watch and how it is just wrecking society and our kids.

1:39.0

Very uplifting topic, but seriously the guy is brilliant. So have a listen to that. We also had Greg McEwan if you've read essentialism or even if you have in his new work is called effortless he's just a very productivity is not quite the right word for it.

1:52.0

You know, I guess you would put it in that camp, but really it's about focusing on the right things if you're a fan of clarity in your thinking that's a really good episode as well.

2:00.0

Please make sure you've had a listen to everything we created for you here this week and Gabe also came across an interesting article this week about Frank Abignail Jr.

2:09.0

So you know, episode one of this show world renowned count artist, they made a movie about his life catch me if you can.

2:15.0

So there's now some speculation that maybe his whole story about being a con man who played a pilot or who pretended to be a pilot a doctor and a lawyer.

2:24.0

Maybe that's actually the con that he pulled maybe that's all actually just BS and there's a book about it by a journalist called the greatest hoax on earth catching truth while we can and basically his conclusion was this Abignail might have done some of the stuff they said he did.

2:39.0

But mostly it's embellished or exaggerated and a lot of it's fabricated and his parole officer was like, hey, present yourself as this transformed man.

2:48.0

And then he came up with a story about how he used to do all these amazing things and now he wants to help the FBI and the police catch criminals and this is an investigative journalist not some muckerector you know on Twitter.

2:59.0

So it's really interesting because we don't know what's true and what's not or that Abignail was lying about everything I just wanted to share it because obviously I never want to participate in any kind of misinformation or self mythologizing and I know that we value independent thought critical thinking and they said it best in the article the author of this book.

3:17.0

That's going after Abignail. He said many people when they step back from the story and really take a breath and really think it through.

3:24.0

Is it possible that all this happened according to the narrative and it's just not it's just not plausible. This is what he said and he said it's so reflective thinking is something I think that is of extreme value to society right now.

3:35.0

And I agree with that and I think that it is very interesting that this man who supposedly conned all these folks really is just conning us allegedly.

...

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