515 - Romanticization: Friend or Foe?

Multiamory: Rethinking Modern Relationships

Multiamory, LLC

Sexuality, Self-improvement, Relationships, Health & Fitness, Society & Culture, Education

4.9 • 935 Ratings

🗓️ 4 February 2025

⏱️ 60 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Today we're talking about romanticization and its role in our relationships, our lives, and more. We all idealize something, whether it's a place, a person, or a choice, but what happens when our idealized version clashes with reality? We'll be discussing whether romanticization is helpful for us and our life choices or if it ultimately hurts us in the long run. Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.supercast.com. We offer sliding scale subscriptions so everyone can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community.Get hair care that is completely customized to your hair and your life AND get 15% off at Prose.com/multiamory Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com. We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	I think all of us have had experiences on both sides of this, right?
0:06.2	And for me, I know the times when I have been in a relationship where I very much put the other person on a pedestal, it is not gone well.
0:13.6	Right?
0:14.5	Like when I've over-idealized someone, that means I'm more likely to self-sacrifice.
0:19.0	I'm more likely to have a negative self-image. I'm more likely to have a negative self-image.
0:21.7	I'm more likely to not want to speak up
0:23.5	and not have boundaries because I think,
0:25.1	oh my God, this person is so awesome
0:26.5	and I barely deserve to be with them.
0:28.4	Yeah.
0:29.4	And then sometimes if you're with someone
0:31.0	who also like intentionally
0:32.7	or unintentionally takes advantage of that,
0:34.8	then it can be a really bad situation. And so I think I've come away
0:38.4	from those situations, like really wanting to be careful about putting someone on a pedestal
0:43.0	and idealizing them or over-romanticizing them. And then, yeah, like you were showing Emily,
0:47.8	that to be on the flip side of that also can be a turnoff weirdly because it can feel like
0:53.2	someone doesn't actually know or love you.
0:56.4	They love this ideal version of you.
1:00.0	Welcome to the Multiamary Podcast.
1:02.9	I'm Jace.
1:03.9	I'm Emily.
	...

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