509: Befriending Mistrust

Foreplay Radio – Couples and Sex Therapy

Cloud10

Sexuality, Health & Fitness, Mental Health

4.5 • 1.9K Ratings

🗓️ 12 September 2025

⏱️ 33 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

So you've de-escalated your negative cycle and are taking risks to take new moves and bam you get hit with this response: "it's nice to hear you say that, but where has that been for the last 20 years?" Defeat sets in and your protective move is at the ready to defend or withdraw. Why does this happen so often when couples are working together to make healthy changes? Join George and Laurie in today's episode as we discuss how mistrust in healthier relationship patterns is expected and what to do about it. When the brain is so used to something happening one way for an amount of time, it expects and anticipates it. It's all a way to create patterns and predictability which the brain loves. What the brain loves is not always healthy for a relationship. In this episode, we learn how to identify and work with mistrust, create safety around new moves and embrace when we are getting exactly what we've longed for for years. This requires us to tolerate the new move without solely relying on the old pattern, embracing the mistrust and getting success with the new. Has this ever happened in your relationship? Make sure to leave us some feedback on our website, foreplayrst.com or on Instagram (@foreplay_sextherapypodcast). Be brave and keep it hot y'all! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:37.9	Hello, my name is Emily, and I am the host of she's speaking with Emily Hanks and I talk about
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1:00.2	What's up?
1:01.0	I'm Delaney Fisher, host of the self-helpless podcast where science, spirituality, and
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1:16.6	podcasts. The following content is not suitable for children. Okay, George, we're going to talk
1:22.4	about how mistrust is part of the process and how eventually, even when we're worried about the letdown,
	...

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