442: Morbid Mascots

Guide to the Unknown

Kristen Anderson and William Rogers

Tv & Film, Arts, Comedy

4.7 • 1.1K Ratings

🗓️ 8 May 2026

⏱️ 78 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Shouldn't corporate mascots be kind and cute? SO MANY of them are literal monsters! Like the Gobbledok from Australia, or the SLU mascot THE BILLIKEN (a literal GOD). Hey, also: WHY do they keep MANGLING them!? Jack in the Box, and a certain elderly dancer...MAIMED! [⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠YouTube Version⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠] [⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Sources & links⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠] Get this episode AD-FREE on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Patreon⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, along with our exclusive podcast The Netherworld Dispatch! Listen on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Apple Podcasts⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Spotify⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, or wherever you get your podcasts. Watch on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠YouTube⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. Follow us on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Facebook⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Bluesky⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. For more, cruise through our ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠LINKS⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Sources: Digem Frog from Smacks: https://cereal.fandom.com/wiki/Dig_%27Em_Frog Wally the Smacks Bear: https://boxprintify.com/untold-story-behind-the-honey-smacks-frog/?srsltid=AfmBOopTXWd5Cu2EXlGAcRN87BclQESlMxxxssgE3PLX-gMy_efqR_Ze Trix Rabbit: https://hero.fandom.com/wiki/Trix_Rabbit Jack in the Box Guy: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jack_Box Jack Box destroys stuff: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zGeUl7h5Kcc Jack Box Prison Commercial: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2TkRn2AfNCc Jack Box Bus Accident: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kqT_5f08Nxs&pp=ygUcamFjayBpbiB0aGUgYm94IGJ1cyBhY2NpZGVudA%3D%3D Jack Box in the Hospital: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zf5i0O2PNS4 Six Flags guy commercials: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hTLjO860Y7I Mr. Six dies: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AtVlsfGgsIU Mr. Six Rises: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ooi6Fr1hpf0 Last sighting of Mr. Six: https://www.youtube.com/shorts/r4sYNZZpn40 https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Billiken https://www.museumofplay.org/blog/the-billiken-dolls-racist-history/ https://www.stlpr.org/education/2016-09-22/new-slu-billiken-mascot-gets-cheers-and-a-lot-of-jeers https://www.killyourdarlings.com.au/article/an-oral-history-of-the-gobbledok/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=twUbDDhB2sE https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wc0EUP6wtjo&pp=ygUMZ29iYmxlZG9rIGFk https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3vIaCXCkkrs&pp=ygUMZ29iYmxlZG9rIGFk0gcJCd4KAYcqIYzv

Transcript

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0:00.0	He's waddling down.
0:00.9	He's like, oeep, heap, up, up, down the aisle and everything.
0:04.4	They're very cute.
0:05.1	I don't know.
0:05.9	I don't know. I hear a threat. You hear danger. I hear danger. Yeah. No, I get that. Hello, welcome to guides the unknown. I'm Kristen. And I'm her little brother William. And this week we are taking a look at some more freaky, deaky mascots who are selling us this and that.
0:24.6	This, that and the other.
0:26.6	Yeah.
0:27.6	I have a soft spot. I remember being a kid, specifically going into the cereal aisle and looking at all of these like cartoon figures on the boxes.
0:35.6	And you'd see the, you'd see like the tricks rabbit
0:37.8	in commercials and it was always put together as if this was like a a show or something like a
0:45.1	little skit totally don't give that rabbit that serial yeah you're following their continuing
0:49.8	adventures but they're not real characters right they're not real characters they're like They're not real characters. They're like a trick.
0:55.0	Yeah. You know what I mean? Just like the cereal. Oh my God. Whoa. Trick. The tricks rabbit is a trick.
1:02.1	Yeah. It's all the way to the top. It truly does. But so we've we've looked at mascots before because some of them are monstrous or cryptid-esque and I we thought hey
1:14.6	maybe it would be fun to do that again are there any other monster mascots out there that we can
1:18.6	dig into totally I found some very unusual ones I ended up Googling like monster mascots with a
1:27.1	backstory I think that's what I put into Google. And I got some that certainly I hadn't heard of. And when I sent them to you to be like, hey, just avoid these, which I knew would be no problem. You were like, okay, no problem. What the hell is this? Does that even count as a mascot if no one knows what it is? You know what I mean? Like, you sent me, I think you sent me like words that I've never read before. I had never read them before. I'll be talking about the Billiken and the Gobble Dock. The Gobble Dock? I'm a doctor of gobbles. Now, the Billikins a sports mascot. Okay, fair enough. And the gobble dock. I'm a doctor of gobbles.
2:03.0	Now the billikins a sports mascot.
2:04.1	Okay, fair enough. And the gobble dock is an Australian chip mascot.
2:07.6	Chip mascot.
2:08.7	Yes.
2:09.2	Potato.
	...

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