44: Terms and Conditions (The Book of Jeremiah, Part 2)

Apocrypals

Chris Sims

Comedy, History

4.9 • 650 Ratings

🗓️ 23 June 2019

⏱️ 87 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

The boys are back in town, Theophiloi, and we've got some breaking news: it seems the Kingdom of Judah has broken its covenant with the Lord of Hosts and will be punished with sword, famine, and plague! Seems like pretty exciting stuff, until the 30th time you've been through it, which is pretty much Jeremiah in a nutshell. Join us as we finish out the longest book in the Bible (and hopefully our longest gap between episodes), won't you?

Topics of discussion: Joe Casey and Ben Marra's Jesusfreak, Chris's impending Bible tattoo, Ashura poles, the many sieges of Jerusalem, cravin' Newtons, the satisfaction of the thirsty, dankest Cush, you mean tall Nergal-sharezer?, the lost tribe of Amazons, the Lord's extremely bro-ish punishment for Moab, opinions about Edom, a desolation of ostriches, so many good pillars.

Hymnal: "Kiss From a Rose" by Seal

Offertory: Each person should do as he has decided in his heart, so if you enjoy the show, head to ko-fi.com/apocrypals, for the Apocrypals love a cheerful giver.

Transcript

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0:00.0	This is what the Lord of Host says.
0:02.5	I'm about to send against them sword, famine, and plague,
0:05.2	and will make them like rotten figs that are inedible because they are so bad.
0:09.8	The Book of Jeremiah, chapter 29, verse 17.
0:14.0	Baby, I can bring to a kiss from the rose on the grave.
0:20.5	Ooh,
0:21.2	the more I get a new stranger with the years.
0:24.8	Yeah.
0:26.6	And now that your roses in blue,
0:30.6	I like it's the bloom on the green.
0:35.2	Hello, friends and neighbors.
0:36.8	And welcome back to Apocrypal's.
0:38.8	It's the podcast where two non-believers read through the Bible and we try not to be jerks
0:42.4	about it.
0:43.2	My name, in case you have forgotten, is Chris Sims.
0:46.9	With me as always is the other set of footprints.
0:48.9	Benito Serino.
0:50.0	Benito, how do we do this show?
0:53.0	Yeah, that's a great question to which the answer increasingly is fading from my memory.
1:02.6	Yep, just like all those little things that are part of the routine of this show have just like, like, sands through the hourglass here's here's my whole thing
1:13.8	jeremiah's hard to get through yeah um it's not i feel like i feel like a good 70% of our problem
1:23.6	was neither of us wanted to go back to j. By the way, if you are listening to
	...

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