This is self-work and I'm Dr. Margaret Rutherford.

At self-work we discuss psychological and emotional issues and what you can do about them.

Whether that's learning self-acceptance, taking action, or seeking therapy or treatment.

Eight years ago I extended the walls of my practice to reach those of you

who might already be knowledgeable about mental health treatment but also to those

of you who might say you'd never jarken the door of a therapist.

And yet you are here.

I'll answer your questions.

While I invite you to take a few minutes

for your own self-work.

There's another recent term. it's called intensive parenting, where you're always involved. And then there's its opposite, what's called free-range parenting. Maybe somewhere

in the middle is good. And of course it also depends on the

personality and the character of your child. What are their strengths? What are their struggles?

Welcome to this week's edition of self-work.

There were many times when I was actively parenting our child that I thanked a psychology

researcher named Winnicott.

Back when he was writing, most theorists of the day

blamed mothers for every possible problem

a child might have.

There was a schizophrenic mom who's chaotic

and often you can't win for losing style of communication caused problems.

The refrigerator mom was another one whose coldness led to the child escaping into autism.

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