Your first great love story is free when you sign up for a free 30-day trial at audible.com.

That's audible.com.

We do. We need a pre-show. Actually, I might play that clip. We need a pre-show before the pre-show.

No, no, don't reveal any shit. See, when we haven't actually started the cams, I talk a lot of shit, and we don't need that out in the public. Is everything on, by the way, today? Everything's on. I think we did. All right, good. Because the show that we did, I think the Thanksgiving show, I know. I think I forgot to hit record, like, at the end of the show or something. Well, we started the cameras like five times. So there's a lot of working parts in a home studio. I just start to say that.

All right.

How's your coffee girl?

Oh.

Oh.

It's even better because it's made and you're a $3,000 coffee maker. Schman made it. You know, we got a $400 coffee maker for our wedding. I actually was saying this when I was home for Thanksgiving. You know. I keep saying it's $3,000. Oh, it's $400?

Yeah, I think it was only $400 or $500.

I taste poorer already.

Yeah, I know, I know. Because I was telling my mom about my mom and brother and my niece about our coffee maker, the $400 coffee pot, and it doesn't have a timer. Like, because theirs is like a... Oh, in the morning, every morning they wake up and it's there yeah the one in Maine that they

have is like a $20 Mr. Coffee and it has like a timer and your mom's like what are you walking around

with a $400 coffee maker there's no there's no timer yeah exactly my mom and brother were like why would

you want a coffee maker without a timer wait I don't understand why doesn't it have a timer I don't know

because oh because it's $400 because

this coffee maker claims that the reason that you don't get a good cup of coffee is because

you're supposed to actually warm up the water first. So people usually make coffee with cold

water and then it like heats together as it's making coffee. But this one pre, this one

boils the water first and then introduces the coffee, which is therefore supposed to make it taste not burnt. Got it. And more of like a coffee flavor. What do you notice? Well, I'll tell you what. And I drink cold brew. I recently learned a new term. It's called cold brew colon because you just like shit your brains out all the time and your colon's destroyed by the age of 30. Cold brew colon,

everyone, that's what I have. But this tastes delicious. Okay, look, as someone who's had major

bowel issues, anal fissures, I mean, I've got to die vaticulitis with craters the size of the Grand

...