#395 — Dear Lisa: 'My Sexless Marriage Is Killing Me!'
Love, Happiness and Success with Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby
Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby
4.6 • 849 Ratings
🗓️ 1 April 2024
⏱️ 48 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Has the sexual intimacy in your relationship dwindled to almost nothing? Or, do you long to feel desired by your partner, but instead feel like you're being rejected? If so, this episode is for you. You'll learn why sexless marriages (or sexless relationships of any kind) happen, and how to reignite the spark with your partner and cultivate the physical and emotional intimacy you crave.
When couples stop having sex, it can be a sign that their relationships are suffering in other ways as well. They may be feeling lonely and emotionally disconnected from each other. Often, there's resentment or an old emotional wound that hasn't been healed. Sexuality can be the canary in the coal mine that lets you know your relationship is in trouble.
It takes courage to explore the root causes of a "dead bedroom." But doing so is the path to rekindling the passion you want and deserve.
On today's episode, I'm answering a question from a listener who's feeling adrift in his sexless marriage, and offering some universal advice that will help every couple communicate better about sex, understand each other more deeply, and keep the spark alive for the long haul.
Tune in to learn:
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | All relationships go through dry spells, but when couples like stop having sex and it goes on for a while, |
| 0:09.2 | it threatens much more than a physical connection. Dead bedrooms can do real damage to emotional |
| 0:16.8 | intimacy that can show up in other parts of the relationship and create barriers that make it |
| 0:23.0 | even more difficult than to rekindle a satisfying sex life. So it needs to be addressed. And on today's |
| 0:30.3 | show, we're talking about sexless marriages and how you and your partner can find your way back |
| 0:36.1 | together again. |
| 0:48.8 | We're listening to Mr. Airplane Man. |
| 0:52.2 | This is the song, Do You Want to Hang Out? Which I thought was an appropriate choice for our mood music today, |
| 0:57.3 | because it talks about that desire but uncertainty. |
| 1:01.7 | I might get shot down, and that's kind of how it feels |
| 1:04.8 | when you and your partner have not been together for a while |
| 1:08.5 | and you'd really like to reconnect, but feel like you can't. And |
| 1:13.3 | that's where we're going today. I'm your host, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby. My background here, I'm a |
| 1:19.7 | marriage and family therapist. I'm a licensed psychologist, board certified coach, and also the |
| 1:24.3 | founder of growing self-counseling and coaching. So I do a lot of different things, |
| 1:29.0 | but truly in my heart of hearts, I am a marriage counselor first. And I really wanted to talk |
| 1:34.8 | about this issue, sexless marriages or, you know, sexless relationships of any kind, because |
| 1:42.3 | it's so important. And it's also very common and it's also |
| 1:47.6 | really hard to talk about even in couples counseling. I tell you what, I have worked with so many |
| 1:56.7 | couples over the years. They come in. They have, you know, disagreements, they're not connecting |
| 2:01.8 | emotionally, all the things. And, you know, I take that at base value. We start working on stuff. |
| 2:07.3 | And then I've learned since to not do this, but then it would sort of come out sooner or later that, |
... |
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