374 SelfWork: How to Stop Chasing The Next Best Thing: Moving from FOMO to JOMO
The SelfWork Podcast
Margaret Robinson Rutherford PhD
4.8 • 1.3K Ratings
🗓️ 29 December 2023
⏱️ 24 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
You’re getting back (or will be soon) to the office or to work or school.. and you start hearing about what everyone else did over the holidays. Maybe you’ve already seen stuff on social media that seems to tell their story. Maybe you’ve scrolled Instagram reels or watched hilarious TikToks. Your own life may shrink in comparison - especially if you're living in fear.
That's the topic for today. How to confront your fear of missing out (FOMO) or how to stop chasing the "next best thing" and instead, to live in joy (JOMO) or at least contentment. Here's Lauren Cook's and Dr. Cathy Sullivan Windt's definition of JOMO: "JOMO is the satisfaction one feels in the current moment, with accompanying acceptance of what one doesn’t have in that moment.” (their article is linked below...).
Vital Links:
Lauren Cook and Dr. Cathy Sullivan-Windt's wonderful article on JOMO:
An earlier SelfWork episode on FOMO
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | This is self-work and I'm Dr. Margaret Rutherford. At self-work we discuss psychological and emotional issues and what you can do about them, |
| 0:15.3 | whether that's self-acceptance, taking action, or changing your attitude. |
| 0:19.6 | Eight years ago, I extended the walls of my practice to reach those of you who might already |
| 0:24.0 | be knowledgeable about mental health treatment but also to those of you who might |
| 0:28.1 | say you'd never darkened the door of a therapist and yet you're here I'll answer your questions while I invite you to take a few |
| 0:35.8 | minutes for your own self-work. Let's define FOMO. It's the recent acronym that describes heightened anxiety when believing |
| 0:46.8 | that you're missing the action. Your life isn't as great as someone else's, or you're |
| 0:51.4 | not in the know about what's going on. |
| 0:56.0 | Welcome to this week's edition of self-work. |
| 0:59.0 | So you're getting back or will be soon to the office or to work or to school and you're going to start |
| 1:04.9 | hearing about what everyone else did over the holidays. Maybe you've already seen stuff on social |
| 1:09.7 | media that seems to tell the story of what everyone else did. |
| 1:14.0 | Maybe you've scrolled Instagram reels or watch hilarious tick talks. |
| 1:18.0 | And what did you do? They'll ask. |
| 1:21.0 | How do you feel about your answer? What if your answer is not much except |
| 1:25.8 | enjoyed being with a friend or two or I had kind of a quiet week or I went to go |
| 1:31.0 | visit my grandmother? Not stuff that's very tick-talkable. Do you feel less |
| 1:36.7 | then? Somehow that your life isn't as special as other peoples? People seem to be describing the best things you could experience. |
| 1:45.6 | A Taylor Swift concert, an incredible home-cooked meal, or better yet one in a restaurant. |
| 1:51.4 | But how does it feel to stay away from chasing that next best thing? |
| 1:57.0 | Today we're going to focus on that and we're going to use the concepts of FOMO, the fear of missing out, the very common and expansive fear of |
| 2:05.8 | missing out, and its counterpart and much more relaxed JOMO, JOMO, and that's the joy of missing out on that next best thing. |
... |
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