One of the key principles of being a master at relationships, and this is relationships of all kinds.

It's just to amplify through romantic relationship is this ability to navigate ruptures, like disruptions in our relationships, and repair those ruptures.

This is not something we're generally taught in childhood, and that's because, you know, maybe, for example,

our families never fought in front of us, our parents never did, or they fought in front of us,

but we never saw the repair. Often the repair happens behind closed doors, or it never happens.

You know, I've worked with someone who's like, my childhood was incredible. There was never

conflict. And that's the story I used to say. So

instantly I was like, okay, like let's let that sit there. But when we dove deeper into his

relationship patterns, he saw that he was extremely conflict avoidant because ultimately the message

he was taught as a kid was only good

things right like only good vibes only you know the shirts made about that and so he was able to

recognize that he was avoiding all types of conflict because one his family system taught him that

and he didn't know how to navigate conflict.

He thought that conflict was disruptive to relationships, which it can be, of course.

But really successful couples, it's not that they don't have conflict.

It's how they navigate conflict that's different.

In the book, Liberated Love that Kylie, my wife and I, co-authored, which is available for

pre-order now, we talk about how to create that type of dynamic, how to look at what

things shaped you relationally so that you have the pattern that you have because Because one of the greatest complaints I hear from couples and that we hear together is that, hey, we keep having the same conversations over and over again.

We can't seem to navigate conflict and like get past this thing.

Fighting about the same things is about living the same patterns, right?

If we want to change our patterns, we have to change our choices.

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