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forward slash survey. Today's episode is Last Christmas, written by Michael David Wilson and narrated by Persephone Rose.

I was carving up the turkey and listening to Christmas songs when Lily said it.

Her parents were still in traffic.

But she'd insisted I carve anyway, saying, look at the size of the thing. By the time it's ready,

they'll be here. And if not, they'll deserve cold turkey. Lily could benefit from cold turkey.

She'd returned home around 2 a.m., smelling like she'd swum in a beer barrel and yabbering

about shit I'd done wrong. Happy fucking Christmas. When we awoke, she was all cheer and bounce,

probably still pissed. By 11, she was back on the wine. Wham's last Christmas started up. Imagine if someone actually did, Lily said.

Did what?

Gave you their heart?

They'd be dead.

It's a metaphor, not literal.

If it was literal, it would be,

...