This is the BBC.

Let's talk about your turkey crown.

Because we've discussed this a little bit on Twitter.

We've been having something of a luxury poultry off this week.

Yeah. Because you announced that you felt very mature.

Yes.

Because you've just bought a turkey crown in capital letters.

I made...

It's one of the big announcements of 2017.

And one...

I could be accused of taking myself a wee bit seriously, perhaps.

But I don't know. I'm going to share this with a wider audience.

This is what Twitter gives to you, the opportunity

to make a complete tip of yourself about a domestic event.

It's of no interest or relevance whatsoever.

It's what that very bright young set of men in their luminous trainers

and their skateboards wanted over in Silicon Valley.

I think it's exactly what they intended.

A chance for a middle-aged woman to celebrate her own maturity

by telling other people who couldn't give a damn.

But this year, she'd reserved turkey crown.

I'm amazed that she given your controlling nature as well.

...