30 Questions to Ask Yourself to Find Love

Almost Adulting with Violet Benson

Violet Benson

Ted Talks, Self Help, Health & Fitness, Millenials, Gen Z, Toxic, Healing, Education, Zodiac Signs, Kim Kardashian, Mental Health Expert, Violetta Benson, #Pop Culture, Violet Benson, Call Her Daddy, Celebrities, Celebrity News, Comedy Podcast, Single, Expert, Personal Growth, Jewish, Manifesting, Violetta, Personal Journals, Mental Health, Self Love, Breakups, Francesca Farago, Lgbtq, Daddy Issues, Love And Relationships, Dating Advice, Stand Up Comedy, Dating And Relationships, Adulting, Self Improvement, 30s, Lifestyle, Society & Culture, Life Coach, Dating, Comedy, Self-improvement, Female Empowerment, Jay Shetty, Relationships, Being 30, Influencer, Astrology, Creator

4.8 • 4.1K Ratings

🗓️ 12 June 2025

⏱️ 45 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

You’re not single because you’re broken—maybe you’re just asking the wrong questions.

In this deeply personal and hilariously honest solo episode, I share 30 questions you need to ask yourself if you’re serious about finding real love—not the situationship, not the trauma-bond, not the 2-week high followed by ghosting. We're talking love that lasts.

I also open up for the first time about being deaf—how it’s made me feel small, different, and deeply afraid of being pitied… and how I moved past it.

This is the episode where we stop waiting to be "healed enough" for love—and finally figure out what we actually want and deserve.

Tune in if:

You keep attracting the same wrong person in a different font
You’re overthinking love to death
You’re ready to be loved without fixing every flaw first

Listen ‘til the end for the story that might just change how you see yourself—and love—forever.

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Transcript

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0:00.0	Not everybody will love you in a way that you understand.
0:04.0	Some people love silently, some love without ever realizing they're in love.
0:08.0	Love doesn't look loving at all.
0:10.0	It's mass by fear.
0:12.0	Sometimes it's not being able to look at someone after they're gone.
0:16.0	Sometimes it's not being able to stop.
0:18.0	It sometimes comes out punishing like the parents who try to force
0:21.9	us into compliance, not realizing that you cannot shame people into changing, that their expression
0:27.7	of anger is a mechanism of their ego, not of their love. Sometimes we choose people to show us
0:33.4	the hidden parts of ourselves. Sometimes we choose people who we know will hurt us.
0:38.3	We are not inherently whole once we found another person to fit into us. Nobody can do that for us.
0:44.3	We have to fill those spaces ourselves. Sometimes it's the only way we can be acquainted with our inner beings,
0:51.3	and even though we do not understand it, it is often the most honest and beautiful
0:56.6	way we love ourselves too. It's Viola Benson, your favorite meme queen and the big sit you didn't
1:01.9	ask for, but see, welcome to almost a adult. Are you ready?
1:12.2	Hi, besties, tiny adults, whatever else you want me to call you, my blood sisters.
1:17.8	By that I mean, I just got my period.
1:19.9	So if you're currently on your period too, we're on the same cycle.
1:23.1	Yay.
1:23.9	Welcome to a brand new almost adulting, the largest self of podcast and movement.
1:28.1	The number one destination for figuring your life out, being okay with it, not always being okay,
1:35.7	trying to adult the best way you can, and eventually realizing that you'll never fully
	...

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