3 Places to be More Loving so Your Partner Feels More Loved: Episode 427
EmPowered Couples with The Freemans
Aaron & Jocelyn Freeman
5.0 • 589 Ratings
🗓️ 16 December 2025
⏱️ 26 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Most couples want to feel more loved, appreciated, and connected. But the way we go about it often backfires. We wait until we're running on empty to tell our partner what we need, and in that vulnerable moment, it's easy for things to slip into defensiveness or comparison. This episode flips that dynamic entirely. Instead of focusing on what your partner isn't doing, we explore the powerful shift of going first—initiating repair, creating small moments of connection, and becoming the kind of loving presence that naturally evokes more love in return.
We'll walk you through three meaningful areas of your life and relationship where small shifts can dramatically change the energy between you. When you focus your effort in these places, you'll notice your partner softening, responding, and giving back in ways that feel natural, not forced. These steps create a positive feedback loop where your daily choices shape your attitude, your emotional tone, and ultimately how loved both of you feel.
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Hello and welcome to the Empower Couples podcast. We're here you get modern, non-boring |
| 0:05.5 | relationship advice for you and your partner to communicate like pros, fight smarter, and stay in the same |
| 0:10.7 | team. No matter the challenge that you face, I am one of your host, Erin Freeman. And I'm |
| 0:14.3 | Jocelyn Freeman, but you all just know it says the Freeman's. And this episode is about |
| 0:18.1 | three places to be more loving so your partner feels more love. |
| 0:24.2 | Now, we want to talk about feeling loved in your relationship because it's the core thing that you each want. |
| 0:32.9 | Oftentimes, what happens, certainly in all the coaching that we do, is that this feeling of being loved |
| 0:40.7 | and connected starts to dwindle. And we're not saying it drops to zero. And if you've listened to |
| 0:45.9 | us before, we do talk about this love account idea that can range from 10 at the highest to, |
| 0:51.4 | I suppose, a actual zero. But we all want to feel high levels of love |
| 0:58.2 | and connection. But what happens is it tends to diminish. Then we go to say something to our |
| 1:07.3 | partner about, I need to feel more loved. I need you to do more of this. |
| 1:13.1 | I'm not feeling loved. And so from that perspective, it's easy for that partner to get defensive |
| 1:18.6 | or even just point out that, well, you're not showing up for me to feel loved and connected either. |
| 1:26.7 | So now you're stuck. You're either in this back |
| 1:29.5 | and forth or that can kind of escalate, but you're both wanting the same thing. You're just |
| 1:33.9 | hoping the other person does their part first. So this is a great rule that we want you to start |
| 1:41.1 | to take in and really live by. that in relationships for you to be the one |
| 1:48.7 | that goes first, the one that goes first in initiating repair, making more deposits, creating |
| 1:55.8 | more moments of connection because in doing so, you enact reciprocity. In psychology, it's called pro-social |
| 2:03.4 | behavior. And basically, you create the environment where your partner wants to do more of what |
| 2:09.6 | you're already giving to them. I also would expand on that. Something I was really reflecting on |
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