Hello, my name's Stephen Fry.

Today it's my pleasure to be your guide on this quite interesting tour of London.

Find out how big Ben keeps accurate time with the help of a handful of pre-decimal coins,

like pennies, farthings and shillings from 1933.

And that...

London's classic red phone boxes were actually based on a tomb.

Join Stephen Fry and the makers of QI

for fun-filled and fact-laden GPS-enabled audio tours.

Enjoy on location or at home.

To get started, visit QI.com slash walking tours. Welcome to Creep's Cast.

I'm the night guard for a store that doesn't exist.

Written by Darkly the bush. I might as well get right to it.

The instructions for the successful defense of the Tartarus Mall are sure and simple.

At first things first, Tartarus ain't actually the mall's name.

That's just what I call the place in account of the store that I have to guard.

I won't tell you the mall's proper name for security reasons.

But yeah, so one of the stores in the mall is called a tartarus, and this store is

perpetually closed.

I've never seen it open.

A metal sheet lives across its door and its window displays are always empty, boarded up even.

The instructions to put them simpler as follows.

One, watch Tartarus. 2. Don't let anybody in. 3. Don't let anyone out.

...