266: Should I Let My Teen Be Intimate at Home?

Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Raising Tweens & Teens

Dr. Lisa Damour/Reena Ninan

Mental Health, Kids & Family, Health & Fitness, Parenting

4.7 • 824 Ratings

🗓️ 7 April 2026

⏱️ 30 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Wondering how to talk to your teen about relationships and intimacy? Clinical psychologist Dr. Lisa Damour has the research-backed answers.Your teenager is in a relationship, and now you're asking yourself a question you never thought you'd have to answer: Do I allow this in my home? This is a tough topic to face, but avoiding it doesn't protect our kids. Honest, values-based conversation does. Dr. Lisa Damour and Reena Ninan unpack what the research actually says about teen intimacy, why your discomfort is valid, and how to respond in a way that reflects your family's values without leaving your teen without guidance. 💡 YOU'LL LEARN: - What developmental psychology actually says about teens in relationships, and where the real concerns lie - Why your instinct to set boundaries in your own home is not only valid, but worth acting on - What today's data reveals about teen intimacy that will likely surprise you - A simple four-question framework for talking to your teen about healthy, mutual, and safe relationships - What one country's approach to these conversations can teach us about getting better outcomes for our kids ________________ Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Raising Tweens & Teens is the essential podcast for parents seeking expert guidance, tested strategies, and psychological insights on raising kids, especially tweens and teens. Join renowned clinical psychologist Dr. Lisa Damour and former journalist and mom of two Reena Ninan as they explore real-life parenting challenges. Looking to learn more about how to boost kids’ resilience, build their confidence, or support their emotional well-being? Dr. Lisa and Reena have got you covered! Together they address listener questions about stress, anxiety, social media concerns, school pressures, and challenges in peer relationships. Each episode provides practical advice and science-backed solutions to help parents raise resilient, confident, and emotionally healthy kids. Tune in every week for the latest topics in parenting, child psychology, and family wellness. Get answers to your most pressing parenting questions. New episodes drop every Tuesday. Episode keywords: teen intimacy, healthy teen relationships, teen consent, teen girlfriend boyfriend, teen sexual health, sex positive parenting, talking to teens about relationships, should I let my teenager have a partner over, parenting teens about intimacy, how to talk to your teen about relationships, teen relationship statistics, Dutch parenting style, teen developmental milestones, teen dating advice, teen relationship advice Podcast keywords: ask lisa podcast, lisa damour, dr lisa damour, reena ninan, psychology, parenting, podcast, teens, tweens, parenting teens, parenting tweens, teen parenting, tween parenting, parenting tips, parenting advice, positive parenting, parenting podcast, teen behavior, tween challenges, raising tweens, raising teens, parenting hacks, parenting help, family dynamics, kids podcast, mental health, teen mental health, attachment styles, emotional intelligence

Transcript

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0:00.0	Tell me a parenting issue everyone struggles with with tweens and teens, but no one talks about.
0:06.6	Rina, I think a lot of people feel like they just don't know how to connect to their kid anymore.
0:12.8	I'm Rina Nainen and welcome to Ask Lisa the psychology of raising tweens and teens.
0:17.6	And I'm Dr. Lisa DeMore.
0:19.1	We bring you science-back strategies for managing anxiety, discipline, intense emotions, and more.
0:24.6	We decode tough parenting issues with tips you can use right now.
0:28.6	So subscribe to Ask Lisa the psychology of raising tweens and teens and join our YouTube community today.
0:35.6	Just Google, Ask Lisa Podcast.
0:38.0	We're here to help you untangle family life.
0:43.3	Episode 266, should I let my team be intimate at home?
0:59.8	So piercings last week, and this week, should your kid have sex in your house?
1:03.3	We like our teen spicy, and they give us much to work with.
1:04.6	Oh, my gosh.
1:06.2	I can't wait to dive in.
1:06.9	I'm just going to read you.
1:09.2	This is probably the shortest letter we've ever gotten.
1:10.1	It just says this.
1:11.5	Dear Dr. Lisa, should I let my 17-year-old have sex with his girlfriend at our home? It feels wrong, but I don't
1:17.0	want him to do it in the car. Help in all capital letters, exclamation point. Oh, man, but it says so
1:26.4	much. There's so much in there. There is so much in there. Where should we
1:30.8	begin? It's got all the information I would want. How old? Who's he having sex with? Right. So, I mean, the kid's 17. Yeah. So what do you think? 17-year-old wanting to have sex in the house? Well, okay, let's take the 17 year old wanting to have sex.
1:45.7	Well, first of all, and I really appreciate that this parent's like, the kid's going to be having
	...

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