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Dating Intentionally

251. What To Say In Conflict For Calmer Communication w/ Rikki Cloos

Dating Intentionally

Talia Koren

Education, Relationships, Society & Culture, Self-improvement

4.7596 Ratings

🗓️ 3 April 2026

⏱️ 58 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

I'm chatting with Rikki Cloos, the creator and author of Anxious Hearts Guide, one of the most grounded, accessible resources out there for healing insecure attachment. We're discussing communication mistakes most of us make without realizing it, why the words we say rarely match what we actually mean, and how that gap affects relationships. Rikki also shares her framework for improving communication and the seven relationship agreements she has with her husband. At the end, we tackle a dating dilemma from a listener who's been in couples therapy for months but is somehow feeling more distant from her partner.

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE

Episode 48 - all about getting your needs met as an anxiously attached person


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Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Being able to show up on dates and keep going in your dating life requires energy. It requires

0:05.4

emotional and mental and physical capacity. And one thing I've learned is that protecting that

0:10.1

capacity starts with the basics, sleep, movement, and of course, eating well. When I'm depleted

0:14.9

and I don't want to think about food at all, I am not showing up as my best self anywhere,

0:19.4

including in my relationship.

0:24.6

So I've gotten really intentional about removing the things that drain me.

0:28.7

And as much as I love cooking, some days I just need to skip it.

0:30.2

That's where Factor comes in.

0:34.8

These are fully prepared dietitian design meals that are ready in two minutes.

0:36.9

Factor shops, preps, and cooks.

0:38.6

I just pop them in the microwave and eat. It's real food, no shortcuts on quality, lean proteins, colorful veggies, healthy fats, and

0:44.8

no artificial sweeteners, no refined seed oils, just the good stuff that your body needs. We recently

0:50.6

tried their country herb chicken and potato leak mash that came with corn and zucchini.

0:55.3

And this was so good.

0:57.5

It's just what I needed after a long day of recording.

1:00.9

And I love a meal that's cozy but also protein forward.

1:04.2

And I think a lot of factors meals fit the bill.

1:07.5

Another one of my favorites is factors gochi dang salmon with rice and bok choy. This is something

1:12.8

I will happily eat every day for the rest of my life. But of course, sometimes it's kind of

1:17.6

hard to choose because Factor has over 100 rotating weekly meals, so it never gets repetitive.

1:23.2

And if you have specific goals like you want more protein, more fiber, or maybe you're working on

1:27.8

strength and recovery, really whatever you're looking to do, there is a collection built for that

...

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