5 • 626 Ratings
🗓️ 16 July 2025
⏱️ 91 minutes
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If you grew up in Church in the 90s and early 2000s you remember the CRAZE that was the book "I kissed Dating Goodbye by Joshua Harris. Purity culture was rampant in the church, preaching to young girls their worth was their virginity and that their bodies belonged to their fathers until they were given to their future husbands. YIKES.
Do you know that Joshua Harris has now denounced both the book and his stance?
Today Jubilee Dawns joins me on a deep dive about purity culture in the church, the damage it wreaked on ours and other women's lives and share our first "Youth Pastors Gone Wild" segment.
Purity culture emerged in American evangelical Christianity in the 1990s and early 2000s, emphasizing abstinence from sex before marriage as a moral and spiritual ideal, particularly for girls and women. It promoted the idea that a woman's worth was intrinsically tied to her sexual behavior, often using metaphors like "chewed gum" or "used tape" to describe those who had engaged in premarital sex. Movements like True Love Waits and purity balls encouraged young girls to make vows of chastity, often symbolized by rings and ceremonies involving their fathers.
This culture disproportionately harmed young women by instilling shame, fear, and a deep sense of guilt around their bodies and natural sexual development. Many were taught to suppress their desires, avoid close relationships with boys, and take responsibility for male lust by dressing modestly and remaining “pure.” As a result, countless women have reported long-term effects including sexual dysfunction, body shame, difficulty forming healthy relationships, and trauma from victim-blaming in cases of sexual abuse or assault. Rather than empowering young women, purity culture often silenced and controlled them, framing obedience and modesty as the only path to spiritual value.
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0:00.0 | If you grew up in youth culture in the church in the 1990s or the 2000s, you are very familiar |
0:06.6 | with today's topic, which is purity culture. |
0:09.5 | This idea that women were sold, that focus your life on your future husband, your sexuality, |
0:15.1 | your ownership, and also, it will give you so many blessings if you choose to follow these rules. |
0:21.0 | These rules that were conveniently always directed young women and even young girls as young |
0:26.3 | as young as seven or eight or nine, and that the responsibility solely fell on women, but men |
0:31.8 | were the leaders. |
0:33.1 | It is a culture that has fostered abuse and psychological damage and physical damage to many young women across the country. |
0:40.4 | And we're going to talk about it today. |
0:41.7 | So we're going to do a little bit of a split episode today. |
0:44.7 | I'm going to talk about purity culture. |
0:46.3 | And then I'm going to invite a guest whose life and marriage was directly impacted by these views. |
0:52.5 | We're going to do a little intro about what is purity culture. |
0:55.5 | What does it mean? What does it teach? |
0:57.0 | What are some of the negative impacts? |
0:59.1 | And then my very special guest, Jubilee Dawn, is going to come on with us and talk about her story |
1:03.8 | and get a real life perspective on the damage from purity culture. |
1:07.8 | So buckle up for today's episode of flipping tables. Welcome back to this |
1:18.1 | episode of flipping tables where we talk about purity culture. I've been building this episode for a while |
1:22.6 | because in my personal opinion, this is one of the most harmful things that Christian nationalism, |
1:27.7 | fundamentalism, and the church as a whole does to young women. And I grew up right in the heat |
1:32.7 | of it, in the thick of it, with books like, I kiss dating goodbye, and true love waits, |
... |
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