230: What if you discovered you were the enemy?
This Is Actually Happening
Wondery
4.6 • 9.9K Ratings
🗓️ 12 April 2022
⏱️ 58 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
“It’s just terror, it’s just fear with no object…It’s so purely guttural and instinctive it’s almost like the prey of a tiger…the moment that it knows it’s about to be ripped apart.”
Today's episode featured Neil Woods. You can find out more about Neil by going to neilwoods.net, where you can also find links to his two books: Good Cop, Bad War and Drug Wars, with more about his own experience and about the War on Drugs in Britain. To find out more about his organization, LEAP, or Law Enforcement Action Partnership, go to lawenforcementactionpartnership.org.
Producers: Whit Missildine, Andrew Waits
Episode Summary: Growing up with a sense of heroic duty, a man becomes a cop fighting the drug war, when the sobering realities of his job lead him to profound awakening.
Social Media:
Instagram: @actuallyhappening
This Is Actually Happening Discussion Group on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/201783687561039/
Website: www.thisisactuallyhappening.com
Website for Andrew Waits: andrdewwaits.com
Content/Trigger Warnings: near death, violence, suicide, mention of sexual assault, mention of gang rape, domestic violence, explicit language
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Intro Music: "Illabye" – Tipper
Music Bed: Ambient Themes by Nigel Coutinho
Services
If you or someone you know is struggling with the effects of trauma or mental illness, please refer to the following resources.
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255
National Alliance on Mental Illness: 1-800-950-6264
National Sexual Assault Hotline (RAINN): 1-800-656-HOPE (4673)
Crisis Text Line: Within the US, text HOME to 741741
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Transcript
Click on a timestamp to play from that location
| 0:00.0 | This is actually happening features real experiences that often include traumatic events. |
| 0:04.2 | Please consult the show notes for specific content warnings on each episode |
| 0:07.6 | and for more information about support services. |
| 0:17.2 | It's just terror. It's just fear with no object. |
| 0:21.1 | It's so purely guttural and instinctive. It's almost like the prey of a tiger |
| 0:26.4 | that is giving its last kicks to try and stay alive. The moment that it knows |
| 0:31.6 | it's about to be ripped apart. It's that moment of utter horror. |
| 0:36.0 | From laundry, I'm Whitney Missildine. You are listening to this is actually happening. |
| 0:59.4 | Episode 230 |
| 1:00.9 | What if you discovered you were the enemy? |
| 1:09.1 | Hey, prime members. You can listen to this is actually happening. Add free on Amazon Music. |
| 1:15.1 | Download the app today. You've got great taste in music and now you can show it off with them. |
| 1:21.3 | Amazon Free Live Radio App where anyone with Wi-Fi can hop on the mic and play their best mix. |
| 1:27.1 | Download app that's AMP in the app store or go to onham.com. |
| 1:32.5 | Let's say you love sports but are also, you know, a busy person. |
| 1:36.2 | You want to know the latest sports news but don't want to sit through a two-hour podcast. |
| 1:41.2 | All right, if we're talking about you right now then check out the new podcast from Wondering. |
| 1:45.1 | Listen to the lead starting five on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcast. |
| 2:03.6 | I grew up in quite a sheltered place in the peak district in Darbyshire in the north west of England. |
| 2:08.7 | I was very happy growing up as a kid. I felt loved although, you know, there was no hugs and kisses |
| 2:15.9 | but I still felt loved and it was a calm environment and nice home. |
| 2:20.4 | I was a quiet child, I suppose. I was geeky, you know, I was into my books and I was into |
... |
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