#202 | From Bliss to Rage: A Mother's Journey with Postpartum Depression

Down to Birth

Cynthia Overgard & Trisha Ludwig

Pregnancy, Childbirth, Postpartum, Midwives, Alternative Health, Home Birth, Society & Culture, Newborn, Documentary, Hypnobirthing, Kids & Family, Health & Fitness, Breastfeeding, Pregnant, Birth, Maternity, Motherhood

4.8 • 586 Ratings

🗓️ 1 March 2023

⏱️ 34 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

When Lauren gave birth to her first baby, everything was seemingly perfect. Breastfeeding was going well, and she was totally in love with her baby girl. What she didn't see coming was a series of lifestyle changes including moving that set her up for her previously-managed OCD transforming into bouts of postpartum rage. At 9 months postpartum, when her pediatrician told her that her baby was too small, the regularly occurring outbursts that soon followed were classic for the postpartum...

Transcript

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0:00.0	Like I would get so angry at Andrew sometimes and there was nothing inside of me that I could do to stop myself from having this outburst until I got it all out.
0:16.5	And then I would feel like the world's worst wife, like the most evil person on the planet,
0:23.0	and I would just break down into tears. I have laundry to do, the babies crying, the TV's
0:30.6	too loud, my clothes feel weird. I'm so overstimulated. I looked at him and I said,
0:36.3	I don't want to kill myself, but I wish that something
0:40.4	awful would happen to me so that I would die. Like, I wish I could just evaporate into this
0:45.8	bed right now and die. I feel so trapped in where I am and I don't know how to get out of it.
0:56.9	I'm Cynthia Overgard, owner of Hypnoborthing of Connecticut, childbirth advocate, and postpartum support specialist. And I'm Tresha Ludwig,
1:02.9	certified nurse midwife and international board certified lactation consultant. And this is the
1:08.2	Down to Birth Podcast.
1:13.8	Childbirth is something we're made to do.
1:18.4	But how do we have our safest and most satisfying experience in today's medical culture?
1:21.3	Let's dispel the myths and get down to birth.
1:41.7	I am Lauren McLeese. I'm 23 years old. I have a beautiful 15-month-old daughter. And I'm here to talk about my experience with my postpartum depression and how that manifested into rage. I had an absolutely
1:48.4	beautiful birth. It was 33 very long hours. I gave birth at the only freestanding birth center
1:58.0	in all of South Carolina. There's only one, and it is in Mount Pleasant,
2:03.8	South Carolina, which is just across the bridge from Charleston. So I went into labor early in the
2:10.6	morning the day before my due date. So I labored at home all day and all night. And then finally around 11 p.m. that night, we went to the birth
2:20.2	center. They did a cervical exam and I was only two centimeters. So it ended up being a very,
2:25.8	very long day, very long night. But 33 hours later, we had the most beautiful eight-pound
2:32.5	little girl, wonderful birth experience it was magical
2:36.4	it was everything that i had hoped it would be and more so so you took this beautiful baby home
	...

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