Best of the Left is made possible entirely by you, the listeners.

To donate or sign up for a membership, please visit BestOfTheLeft.com.

Now welcome to the award-winning BestOfTheLeft podcast with clips today from the Colbert

Report, The Young Turks, The Onion Radio News, The Tom Harden Program, The Rachel Maddo

Show, Countdown with Keith Overman, Media Matters, The Daily Show, The Progressive, and

it's all politics with a bonus video clip for our iPhone app users from The Young Turks.

I have always said that babies are a miracle, unless they belong to homosexuals in which

case they're pets.

I say, I say, if a lesbian wants a child so bad, she should have to steal the seed of a drug

male man and inseminate herself with a turkey baster, like God intended.

And recently, a major scientific study confirmed my fears, Jim.

A 25-year-long study indicates kids raised by lesbian parents have fewer behavioral problems

and rate higher in social and academic competence than their peers.

Yes, lesbians raise well-adjusted teens who don't misbehave, and that proves it's unnatural.

Teenagers are supposed to be cryptic, angsty, mumble, mouth, narcissistic, alienated mood swinging

reclusive cynical hormone junkies who go through vampire phases and are mortified to be seen

with their parents, even when you take them someplace awesome like the Grammys.

So lesbian parents, lesan up.

Stop raising good examples for our children, because history was shaped by troubled teenagers

Alexander the Great, Joan of Art, King Tut.

These teens excelled because they were properly screwed up freaks.

If they'd been raised by lesbians, they'd have been Alexander the relatable, Joan of accounting,

...