193-Abuse, Part 4: I used to "submit"

Delight Your Marriage

Belah Rose

Health & Fitness, Religion & Spirituality, Sexuality, Christianity

4.7 • 589 Ratings

🗓️ 4 December 2018

⏱️ 49 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Here's what is covered in today's episode

There are a ton of "submit" verses in the Bible.
- They were used to abuse me in my first marriage.
- I think these also have made men feel that they had the right to abuse & justify their actions with the misuse of these scriptures.
But what people don't realize is they are reading the Bible (and even translations of the Bible) through a patriarchial lense.
- Don't believe me?
- What does "help-meet" mean?
  - This word which Eve is supposed to be to Adam.
  - Well, it's not the supporting, secondary, servant role you may have always thought.
  - The original word in Hebrew is "ezer kenegedo". Ezer is used 21x in the Old Testament
    - When speaking of Eve 2x in Genesis, it's translated as "help"
    - Three times it is used to describe a powerful nation that comes to save the nation of Israel from their enemies
    - The other 16x it's used to describe God as a military warrior, the powerful savior, giving desperate salvation from foes
    - Is that how you see women?
    - Is that how you see yourself?
What if more verses are viewed through this patriarchial lense and we just aren't aware?
What scriptural references do we KNOW for sure speak of female leadership even in the New Testament (sprinkled among the books including "wives submit to husbands" verses are found):
- Woman apostle
- Paul honoring the 10 out of 28 people who have been colaborers
- Woman deacons

As a feminist myself, this material breaths life to my soul

BUT, what if there IS something to this "submitting" thing in the 21st century, Christian marriages with powerful, feminist women...?
What if there's an empowering message for both men and women when done "right"?
This is a morsel of a much larger conversation, but God-willing it will leave all of us with a bit more of a softened heart to where God may be leading us.

This isn't easy territory, but I pray that it is an eye-opening episode for every listener.

It was my husband's birthday this week and I'm asking every listener to take 5 minutes to review the show!

If you're not sure how, here's a link for delightyourmarriage.com/itunes

Transcript

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0:00.0	Welcome to the Delight Your Marriage podcast, the show where you hear from amazing and inspiring
0:08.1	wives sharing their struggles, triumphs, and advice for this journey called marriage.
0:13.9	Here's your host, Bella Rose.
0:18.0	All right, welcome, welcome.
0:20.5	I am so grateful that you are joining me on the Delight Your Marriage
0:24.6	podcast. I'm not sure if this is your first time. If so, welcome. This is going to be less scary
0:31.5	than you think it is with such a title. But I will say that this is a podcast where I really focus in on how to make your
0:40.2	marriage the best, really as peaceful and purposeful and most fulfilling and in God's will as possible
0:48.8	to really give you joy and fulfillment in this life and most importantly to bring most glory to God
0:56.8	and ultimately to do what is most important in eternal life. So today I'm going to be talking
1:04.5	about submitting, which is a really difficult topic to be talking about. I'm going to be talking about
1:10.0	how I think so many people
1:12.1	have got it wrong and how I used to think about it that I think was absolutely wrong and actually
1:18.5	resulted in the abuse of my marriage. But I also want to talk about what could it look like
1:25.5	when it's actually done right that you might be very surprised about?
1:32.0	And it's actually very empowering and freeing and really just wonderful in a very different way
1:39.9	than probably you've ever heard about it. So I'm going to talk about that.
1:47.8	Now, today, I want to just encourage you, actually, funny enough,
1:50.5	I recorded this podcast on my husband's birthday,
1:53.9	which was just last week, and I had a little surprise party for him
1:56.1	with wonderful dear friends of ours from church and the neighborhood,
1:59.6	and it was really, really a special
	...

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