Okay. Hi. How's it going? It's going really well. How are you? Good. Thank you for coming on my podcast.

It's called Hey Stranger and basically what I do is I go to the park and I interview strangers. Uh-huh.

And yeah, so whenever you said you don't want to answer the secret question, right?

Whatever problem. You can ask me the question. We'll see what happens. You may not like it. You don't like it. You don't put it up.

Okay. It's fair enough. Yeah. Is there a secret you'd be willing to share with us? I think what people might perceive is a secret of them.

Like 6, 2, 2, 20. I was a pretty good rugby player. I'm big, big and strong. But my perception of myself, which I don't think people see, is I feel like I'm a small, gentle person.

Okay. And the only time I see that other person is if I see myself in pictures with others.

And I look at it as him. I guess I'm not that kind of small. And it's like it's how I perceive myself and how others might perceive me.

If you would call that a secret, yeah, maybe. Have you ever said that to anyone?

Um, maybe maybe I've said it to a few and I just said, hey, I just don't see myself as a big person.

Do you wish that you physically were more how you perceive yourself? Like do you wish you were smaller?

Yes, very much so. Because I was in sports and I did fairly well. And it was like if you're the biggest, you're the strongest, you're the fastest, which in some ways I was.

And at pretty decent levels, then they expect you to do this. But as I've moved on in life, I said, you know, if I could go back to high school, I would have been in the choir.

I would have been in the band. I would have been in the acting classes. And I would have said, okay.

The football, the all that other stuff was, yeah, I enjoyed it. And that's what I thought I was supposed to do. But it's gotten older and look back.

And I said, I want to be that weird kid, you know, that kid that's the, the, in the acting class or the kid that's in the choir or just the small little guy that maybe the big guy like me is beating up or something that they were beat up on a little kid.

You weren't that type of person. You didn't like bully anyone as a big guy. Oh, yeah, I did. You did. Yeah, I did occasionally. I'm not not proud of it. But you know, it's just you just.

I was angry, very angry young man. And I kind of expressed that. So there are people who would say I was bullied, not too many of them. Okay. But not not in later life.

Have you forgiven yourself for that? Not really. Okay. No, because how do you forgive yourself for that? You know, you do, you do stuff. And it's just this someone smaller there.

They really can't do anything about it. Then you're just sitting there and you're just a big, big asshole bully. And then, you know, you don't think about it at the time. But yeah, I know I have not forgiven myself probably never will.

Did you at that time when like you were in high school? Did you like even then? Did you wish that you weren't like the football player and like you were actually more into the arts or? Yeah, I do. You know, I'm the like the big guy that goes out there and knocks people down on the fields and stuff. And I was a flanker.

You know, I played some division one and some select side flanker and a winger. And that's pretty intense. Yeah.

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