How does it make you feel to see someone else get what you have been praying for? The very thing you’ve been wanting, even needing, dreaming of for years, and it goes to someone else. But what about you? Has God overlooked you? Why are you left still waiting and wanting? Will it ever be your turn?



It takes a darn big person to sit with empty hands and watch someone else’s hands be filled. It takes an even bigger person to be truly happy for them when they get it and you don’t. Our human nature screams, “Why them and not me? Where’s mine?”



Is this what you’ve been saying? Maybe you haven’t been saying it, but have you been feeling it and thinking it? Oh girl, this one is for you today!



In studying the book of Luke, I read the familiar story of Jesus feeding the crowd of thousands with only the lunch of a boy.I’ve read it from the perspective of the boy who offered his lunch and saw Jesus use his little for something so big.I’ve read it from the perspective of the disciples who were invited to be part of the miraculous by serving.I’ve read it and focused on the sheer impossibility of the numbers. I’ve done the math. 5,000 men in the crowd likely meant at least 15,000 total once you counted women and children. The 5 loaves of bread were not loaves of french bread, they were more like pita crackers. The 2 fish were not massive pieces of protein, they were more like small sardines. The numbers are impossible.



But this time, God showed me something different. He showed me the crowd’s obedience in the wait while they watched others receive.



Luke 9: 12-17:Late in the afternoon the 12 disciples came to Jesus and said, “Send the crowds away to the nearby villages and farms, so they can find food and lodging for the night. There is nothing to eat here in this remote place.”But Jesus said, “You feed them”“But we have only 5 loaves of bread and 2 fish,” they answered. “Or are you expecting us to go and buy enough food for this whole crowd?” For there were about 5,000 men there.Jesus replied, “Tell them to sit down in groups of about 50 each.” So the people all sat down. Jesus took the 5 loaves and 2 fish, looked up toward heaven, and blessed them. Then breaking the loaves into pieces, he kept giving the bread and fish to the disciples so they could distribute it to the people. They all ate as much as they wanted, and afterward, the disciples picked up 12 baskets of leftovers.



This crowd had been gathered all day seeking the words of wisdom and the healing touch of Jesus. They had no food and they were hungry. People get a little crazy when they’re hungry. They get really crazy when they’re hungry and they think there isn’t enough for them. Fights break out in situations like this. Pushing, shoving, yelling. Imagine being in the crowd with your small child who is hungry. What would you do to get them food?



But every account of this story tells of order. Jesus is very specific, “sit them down in groups of about 50 each”. Then he has the 12 disciples distribute the food to the groups. But let’s do the math and consider the wait.



If there were a total of 15,000 hungry people in the crowd, this would make 300 groups of 50. With 12 disciples serving, this would mean each one would be serving about 25 groups. The space required for 15,000 people is the size of a large arena. Think sporting event or concert … all those people. With the disciples serving each of their 25 groups of 50 people, it would take a considerable amount of time to walk from Jesus where the supply is, all the way around the arena to reach every group.