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Money For Couples

171. “I got into a PhD program! But he’s only worrying about the cost”

Money For Couples

Ramit Sethi

Relationships, Society & Culture, Investing, Business

4.63.1K Ratings

🗓️ 27 August 2024

⏱️ 66 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Katy and David are both 32. She just got into a PhD program—one she’s very excited about! But David replied by peppering her on possible outcomes, timing, and most of all, cost. It’s just one stark demonstration of how they’re misaligned on money, but many more examples come to light. This episode is brought to you by: Fabric by Gerber Life | Protect your family today with Fabric by Gerber Life. Apply today in just 10 minutes at https://meetfabric.com/ramit. LMNT | Right now, LMNT is offering 8 single serving packets FREE with any LMNT order. This is a great way to try all 8 flavors. Get yours at https://drinklmnt.com/RAMIT. Masterclass | For unlimited access to every class and 15% off an annual membership, go to https://masterclass.com/ramit. ZocDoc | Download the ZocDoc app for FREE at https://zocdoc.com/ramit then find and book a top-rated doctor today. Trade | Right now, Trade is offering our audience a free bag of coffee with any subscription at https://drinktrade.com/ramit. Links mentioned in this episode • Pre-order my upcoming book: Money for Couples Connect with Ramit • Get the Podcast Newsletter and exclusive Q&A about the show • Get Money Coaching with Ramit • Download the Conscious Spending Plan • Listen to my book—now on Audible • Get my New York Times best-selling book • Get my no-numbers journal • Other episodes • Instagram • Twitter • YouTube If you and your partner have a money issue and you want my help, I occasionally select a couple to work with, free of charge. Apply for my help here. Produced by Crate Media.

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Today we meet David and Katie.

0:02.0

Money conversations just make me uncomfortable.

0:05.0

I don't want to be the technician or the leader.

0:07.0

I want to be a partner.

0:08.0

Katie admits she avoids money and she likes that David will take care of it for her.

0:12.0

David handles all the finances.

0:14.6

David takes care of all of it,

0:16.2

and I just sit back and let him.

0:17.6

David worries about money.

0:18.7

He wants to know where it's coming from,

0:20.0

how much it's going to cost.

0:21.0

He thinks logistics first.

0:23.0

It was all about like becoming the provider, having a good career,

0:26.7

to make enough money to support a family.

0:28.9

They're recently married, and sometimes it's hard for partners to shift thinking

0:32.0

as a single person to a joint way of thinking.

0:34.8

For me it was a lot of like, come on let's go and for Katie she was like I'm not sure I don't know.

0:40.0

When we merged it was very hard for me to kind of get over that hurdle of my money is your money,

0:46.8

your money is my money.

0:48.0

This is just one example over a deep disconnect that they have around money.

0:53.2

Hey, I got accepted to the USFP PhD program.

0:57.8

It was my choice to go back to school,

...

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