#165: People-Pleasing Thought Patterns & How to Break Them (Pt.1 with María-Victoria Albina)

Mary's Cup of Tea: the Self Love Podcast for Women

Mary Jelkovsky

Body-image, Education, Relationships, Self Compassion, Society & Culture, Self Love For Women, Self Love, Self-improvement, Advice For Women, Women's Health, Health & Fitness, Mental Health, Love Yourself, Self Worth, Self-love, Body Image

4.9 • 745 Ratings

🗓️ 8 June 2023

⏱️ 52 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Have you ever said “yes” when you really meant “no”? If so, then you might be a PEOPLE-PLEASER. For those of us who were raised as girls and women, people-pleasing is an all too familiar way of relating to those around us. Today we are joined by Somatic Life Coach María-Victoria Albina who will help us break through these people-pleasing thought patterns and reclaim our authenticity. This conversation is equal parts entertaining and educational, thanks to María-Victoria’s joyful spirit. You will learn about... - what really happens in your nervous-system when you prioritize other people’s needs above your own - non-obvious signs of people-pleasing and codependency - ways to stop yourself from people-pleasing and start being more truthful, direct, and authentic Remember: sourcing your feelings from the outside world is a sign of codependency. Contrary to what you might’ve been taught, your value does not depend on what others think of you. María-Victoria Albina (she/her) is a Master Certified Somatic Life Coach, UCSF-trained Family Nurse Practitioner and Breathwork Meditation Guide with a passion for helping humans socialized as women realize that they are their own best healers by reconnecting with their bodies and minds, so they can break free from codependency, perfectionism and people-pleasing and reclaim their joy. She is the host of the Feminist Wellness Podcast, holds a Masters degree in Public Health from Boston University School of Public Health and a BA in Latin American Studies from Oberlin College. Victoria has been working in health & wellness for over 20 years and lives on occupied Munsee Lenape territory in New York’s Hudson Valley. She’s also the creator of Anchored, a 6-month coaching program and a loving, supportive community for women and afab non-binary folks, where you’ll learn new ways to respond to stress and trauma, ditch codependent, perfectionist and people pleasing habits as you learn to relate to your body, mind and emotions in healthier ways. Follow María-Victoria on Instagram: @victoriaalbinawellness Learn more about María-Victoria’s 6-month coaching program here: https://victoriaalbina.com/anchored And if you enjoyed this episode, screenshot it and share it on social media! Make sure to tag @maryspodcast and @victoriaalbinawellness

Transcript

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0:00.0	Welcome to Mary's Cup of Tea, the self-love podcast for women. I'm your host, Mary Jolkowski,
0:08.8	an author, speaker, an all-around self-love advocate. And this is the podcast that will inspire you
0:15.5	to love yourself. I swear that for most of us who were raised as girls and women in this society, people
0:23.7	pleasing is like the default way that we function, probably because we watch so many women
0:30.3	around us prioritize other people's needs over their own.
0:34.7	And of course, we model that and it gets passed down.
0:39.3	And there's ways small and big that people pleasing shows up in our lives. One silly, comical example is like, if you're on a
0:45.0	road trip and say you have to pee, do you check in with the person you're road tripping with?
0:50.3	Like, if I'm with my husband, he will immediately pull over. It's not even a big discussion.
0:56.4	He's like, I got to pee. We're pulling over to relieve my bowel movements. Whereas if I had to go to
1:02.2	the bathroom, I would be like, hey, babe, do you need to pee? Do you think we could pull over in like 30
1:06.5	minutes? I'll just hold it until then. I don't want to be this inconvenience, right? It's just so, it's laughable
1:12.4	because it's everywhere, but hopefully through today's conversation, we can break through some of
1:18.0	these people-pleasing thought patterns and reclaim our authenticity, thanks to the help of Maria
1:23.6	Victoria Albina. In case you're not familiar with Maria Victoria, my guest for today,
1:29.4	she is a master certified somatic life coach, a UCSF trained family nurse practitioner, and
1:34.9	breathwork meditation guide with a passion for helping humans socialized as women, realize that
1:40.1	they are their own best healers by reconnecting with their bodies and minds so they can break free
1:45.4	from codependency, perfectionism, and people pleasing. This is actually part one of two of my
1:52.0	conversation with Maria Victoria. Today we're talking about people pleasing and next week we're
1:57.2	going to dive into perfectionism and both episodes are equal parts entertaining and
2:01.9	educational thanks to maria victoria's joyful spirit we just had so much fun recording this
	...

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