163: 163 - How To Be Popular

The Tim Dillon Show

News, News Commentary, Comedy

4.8 • 12.2K Ratings

🗓️ 1 September 2019

⏱️ 59 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Patreon link below for bonus episodes. Live from the deck, Tim shares his wisdom on how to gain popularity in school and rise the ranks in society, even though most of you are probably shot.

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Transcript

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0:00.0	At Honda, we decided to stop listening to what Kastu for a moment,
0:04.0	and instead start listening to all the things Hanz do.
0:07.3	They carry scratch, open, close, sip, chop, spread,
0:12.5	shakes, pour, mix, fix, fold, type, tear.
0:18.4	Isn't it time we gave Hanz a rest?
0:20.8	With Keeler's entry, a tailgate that opens with the wave of a foot,
0:25.7	voice controlled into tapent and automatically adjusting seats.
0:31.3	The Honda CRV hybrid. What do you think, Hanz?
0:36.3	Honda with power of dreams, available on selected grades.
0:41.2	Hi, I'm Timmy the trash can, and I love trash.
0:45.6	Popcorn boxes, cups, and candy wrappers.
0:50.4	They all taste so good. Instead of throwing your trash on the floor,
0:55.2	why don't you please give it to me.
0:57.4	Thank you for considering your fellow patrons.
1:03.8	Welcome to the Tim Dillon Show. I'm here with Devon Costa.
1:06.4	Stopped him. We are on the porch, so you're all fucking happy now.
1:09.9	I know. We're not on the porch. Everybody gets angry.
1:14.4	We just saw a clip of Sebastian Manescalco hosting the VMAs,
1:20.1	the video music awards on MTV.
1:21.8	Yeah.
1:22.8	And that is an unwinnable. Yeah, impossible.
1:25.3	It's an impossible position for comedian to be in Sebastian's amazing.
	...

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