154 What Grief Is, How It Heals, and the Pain of Loneliness with J.S. Park

The Place We Find Ourselves

Adam Young

Hope, Christian, Christianity, Healing, Story, Trauma, Psychotherapy, Mental Health, Restoration, Heart, Sexualabuse, Health & Fitness, Adamyoung, Therapy, Attachment, Interpersonalneurobiology, Religion & Spirituality, Limbicsystem, Neuroscience

4.8 • 2.5K Ratings

🗓️ 7 May 2024

⏱️ 46 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

In “As Long As You Need,” author J.S. Park writes that “Grief is not about letting go, but about letting in.” Letting in sorrow, letting in anger, and especially letting in other people who can be WITH us in our pain. This episode is about all kinds of grief—not merely the grief of losing a loved one. One of Joon Park’s main points is that we often experience loneliness in the midst of our sorrow and pain. He says, “It is possible to be in a room full of people, but feel more lonely than if the room had been empty. It is to be unseen. Unseen by those close to you is in some ways worse than having no one see you.”

Transcript

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0:00.0	Welcome back to the place we find ourselves podcast. I'm Adam Young and I am honored today to be joined by a new author, June Park.
0:10.0	June, it's good to see you. Thanks for coming on the show.
0:14.0	Adam, I am very highly and deeply honored to be sitting here with you today.
0:19.0	Thank you.
0:20.0	Just to begin with, say a little bit about, you where you are geographically a bit about yourself and what you spend your time doing
0:27.6	Yeah, I'm in good old Tampa Florida. I'm a hospital chaplain. I've been in hospital chaplain now for almost nine years.
0:35.4	Say a little bit. What does it mean to be a hospital chaplain?
0:40.1	So I can give you the technical clinical definition, which is we are a non-anxious, non-judgmental
0:47.2	comforting presence. And so we are mainly there for spiritual support, grief support and crisis assistance.
0:55.0	But at least in the hospital where I'm at, a thousand plus bed hospital level one trauma center,
0:59.0	we run a wide range of activities from attending every single death in Code Blue to end of life support with decision making, advanced directives, and then ensuring that the patient is connected with their family.
1:14.0	So many, the emergencies that we get in, we're IDing patients,
1:17.0	and then seeing if they have family members.
1:20.0	And so, as you can imagine, it overlaps with a little bit of social work, which who work very closely with.
1:26.1	A lot of it is just sitting and listening to a patient and being with their family.
1:31.5	And honestly, this right now will be the most that I talk all
1:35.4	week. So maybe just to make an obvious sentence, you spend your time in the midst of intensity and trauma?
1:45.8	Yes, so I am very often with patients who are going through the worst day of their lives, the worst moments,
1:58.8	and also sometimes the aftermath of an injury in the midst of an illness. Hospital is one of those places that nobody wants to go to.
2:07.2	Nobody has dreamed of going to, nobody wakes up in the morning wanting to go,
2:10.6	and those with chronic illnesses, hospitals are one of those places where, hey, let's throw everything at this.
2:18.0	And so chaplain sort of sit at that intersection of a person's mortality and their hardest to sorrow.
	...

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