So that's damaging because you're ready for a relationship, you're ready to be looking for someone that has that has aligned themselves with your way of life, and you're blocking that person right now, because you're waiting on someone that's not interested in you.

Hey guys, welcome back to the podcast. This is a very special day because it's actually two weeks in a row. I got my buddy Bernie Calcote as a guest on the podcast.

Bernie is great. We answer your questions. In fact, if you want to email me email GrangerSmithPodcast at gmail.com about any subject. We're going to walk through this just like we're friends sitting around a campfire. And Bernie is that guy for me. So we're all very blessed by Bernie sitting here on the microphone today on this episode to help answer your questions about usually a struggle in life or some kind of decision you're trying to make. Those are usually the questions that come in. And Bernie is great for that.

So this is going to be a good episode. I appreciate you saying that. I appreciate the invite to come back. If I'm good at it, it's only because I have been through many struggles myself and still wrestling through that. And I hope out of that, I can be an encouragement to somebody. So.

Man, with that, let's jump right in. I have a lot of emails. And I'm going to kind of look, I'm just going to scroll down and go boom right there in the middle. Wow, that's a lot of emails. I'm going to hit this. And this one says subject line podcast submission.

It says, Hey, love your podcast. And you have some great advice. Me and my ex fiance are both in the army together. And I got a severe hip injury a year ago. He is currently deployed. And we were supposed to deploy together. We lived together for a year before he left and got engaged.

Before he left. He was set on me being his forever and our relationship seemed healthy until a couple months ago. He broke up with me over FaceTime because he said he was using me to be his happiness.

And he didn't feel like he had any of his own. And he needed to work on himself. I know he's a really great guy. And I'm having a hard time moving on because I still feel like he's my person. And I see it.

It may not be healthy to hold on the hope that we may get back together in the future. Or should I just let this go and try to move on myself?

Would it be worth having a deeper conversation once he comes home? Thanks so much. Kindle.

Hold on. This dude is supposed to be a great guy. But he broke up over FaceTime. Okay, he's deployed. Okay, I get it. Yeah, I give him that.

But he also broke up with her after they had been engaged in long relationship because he said she was using him for her happiness or something like that.

Yeah, so Kindle, what we're reading into is his basically when someone wants to break up, they're going to come up with silly reasons.

And maybe that's not silly, but it's not the whole truth. And it's a little bizarre, but that's just how people break up.

There's like four or five excuses. One of them is I need to get closer to God. Two is I need to work on myself and my own happiness.

Like it's, we never just sounds like this falls into. Yeah, we never say and so let's take a quick tangent on breakups because the best thing you could do in a breakup is be completely honest with the reason you're doing it.

Like you just talk too much. And I can't, I just can't handle it because you talk too much.

Well, that sounds really rude, right? And we don't do that because it sounds rude and it hurts their feelings, but it actually really helps Kindle.

It clarifies like she's like, God, I got it. Because that's just who I am. I talk a lot, but that's just who I am.

So I need to find somebody that likes me for who I am. Yeah, it just clarifies it. Like you said, it just, it makes it makes you sleep better at night going, we broke up because I talk too much. And that's just who I am. I can't fix it.

Yeah, but it doesn't sound like this dude is being being very clear or honest. And it sounds like he's being pretty selfish. And so I think as hard as it is, I think you got to try to move on.

Yeah. And you said he's a really great guy. And I'll acknowledge that because you were with him for a long time. And so you lived with the guy for a year, you got engaged.

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