143: How to Save a Marriage When Only One is Trying
The Empowered Wife Podcast: Marriage Help with Laura Doyle
Laura Doyle
4.7 • 1.1K Ratings
🗓️ 16 August 2022
⏱️ 76 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
How do you save your marriage when you are the only one trying?
It's frustrating when you know your marriage is broken and yet your husband won't do anything about it. He won't read a marriage book, won't go to counseling, won't even have a conversation about it! It can make you crazy. I mean why even try if he's not going to do anything! I know you would much rather saving your marriage be a team effort. I remember feeling this way early on in my marriage. I was dreadfully unhappy and thought divorce would solve all my problems. But as a last resort, I decided to try out some ideas from wives with happy marriages. I was out of options, so why not? These ideas changed everything…and I started to notice that maybe I was part of the problem. Sure, I was the only one trying to save my marriage—but I had been doing all the wrong things. I don't want that to be you! That's why on today's episode of The Empowered Wife Podcast, I'm revealing my top 3 strategies to save your marriage when you're the only one trying.
My guest Liliana and her husband tried to fight quietly but sometimes they spiraled out of control. This was affecting the kids, who were drifting. She was terrified that they would divorce or separate and she'd have to go back to her parents, who always told her her husband would eventually do this to her! But then Liliana did something radical and she has something she's never had before: Her relationship feels easy! She's going to tell us how she did it so you can do it too.
The Worst Relationship Advice of the Week Award goes to a columnist's response to relationship advice (it's shocking!).
Download the FREE Adored Wife Roadmap now and start transforming your relationship today! Click here: lauradoyle.org/roadmap
Here's what you'll get:
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6 SIMPLE steps to bring back playfulness, passion, and connection to your marriage.
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The 3 COMMON mistakes wives make when trying to fix things (and how to avoid them!).
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A clear, actionable plan to create the joyful, loving marriage you deserve.
Don't wait—your playful, passionate marriage is just one click away.
Get started now: lauradoyle.org/roadmap
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Welcome to the Empowered Wife podcast where it's all about fixing your marriage |
| 0:14.5 | without your husband's conscious effort so that you feel desired, taken care of, |
| 0:18.9 | and special even if your relationship feels completely hopeless. |
| 0:23.6 | I'm Laura Doyle and today I'm talking about how to save a marriage when only one of you is trying. |
| 0:30.2 | My guest Lillian and her husband tried to fight quietly, but sometimes they spiraled out of control. |
| 0:36.3 | This was affecting the kids who were drifting. She was terrified that they would divorce or separate, and she'd have to go back to her parents who always told her her husband would eventually do this to her. |
| 0:49.0 | But then Lilliana did something radical and she has something she's never had before. |
| 0:55.0 | Her relationship feels easy. |
| 0:58.0 | She's going to tell us how she did it, |
| 1:00.0 | so you can do it too. |
| 1:01.0 | One of the coaches sent in the worst relationship advice |
| 1:04.1 | of the week nominee from a syndicated advice column |
| 1:07.1 | and the coach wrote, |
| 1:08.4 | this one was shocking for me. |
| 1:11.2 | Me too. |
| 1:12.2 | All of that's coming up, first I'm going to talk about how to save a marriage when only one of you is trying. |
| 1:18.1 | It's frustrating when you know your marriage is broken and yet your husband won't do anything about it like nothing he won't read a |
| 1:26.0 | marriage book he won't go to counseling won't even have a conversation about it it can |
| 1:31.0 | make you crazy I mean why even try yourself if he's not going to do anything |
| 1:36.0 | especially if the problems are mostly his fault then it really seems hopeless that things will ever improve. I remember feeling this way early |
| 1:46.5 | on in my marriage. I was dreadfully unhappy and I felt neglected and overburdened with the finances and the household chores and I often fantasized about divorce, which seemed like it would solve all of my problems. But I knew divorcing would have some drawbacks too, so I decided to try to get my husband to shape up instead. And as Catherine Arred said, if you can't be a good example, you'll just have to be a horrible warning. |
| 2:16.0 | So here's what I learned about what not to do. |
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