We don't have a lot of black folks that are talking about their sexuality and ways that they want to.

We are oftentimes being sexualized, so I like to take matters into my own hands.

And sometimes when I say that I'm I like to take matters into my own hands.

And sometimes when I say that I'm black, people laugh

as if like you could see that I'm black, right?

And they've already raced me as black, right? And my identity could be anywhere along the spectrum and I think it's important for us to talk about that.

King Space is our healing because it was a way for me to experience pain in a way that was on my terms.

And oftentimes the people that get asked to explain who they are or what their gender is are folks that are trans and non-binary and gender not conforming.

But if I asked you, like what does it mean to be a woman to you it would be a lot to kind of

it caps what does that what does woman mean yeah.

Hello I'm Charlotte and I'm Charla and I'm Lauren and this is the secret lives of black women today we're talking identity

Yes and you know in this conversation of identity I'm even thinking about the title of our show

yeah the secret lives of black women and how limiting that title is for a varying degrees of like gender expression.

Absolutely. And it's just making me think you know how there's always those things of check your privilege and we don't think about, I don't know, whenever I think of that term, it's like, oh, this is for like white people, but we didn't even check our like our own privilege as like

cis women that we can just label the show women and not think about it.

But even in our lives we've never had to think about we've never had to question our identity which is the very

definition of privilege I've never it's a privilege that of course I didn't know

I had because that's privilege. And how that as progressive as I think that I am,

just like how exclusionary the title can be. So I just want to be like cognizant and recognize that but also say that we are

learning like I think a big part of the show is like we want to educate ourselves about like the vastness of the world and the black experience and the black fem experience and I am really I'm honored that our guest is here today.

Erica Hart is here and I am just a huge fan and admirer. If you don't know about Erica,

you should learn about them as soon as possible. I have followed them on

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